My Point of View

Meneruskan Langkah

2012-01-15T02:22:00.000-08:00

Satu lagi cabaran pembentangan telah saya lalui pada hari Rabu yang lalu. Sebagai tindakan susulan, saya perlu menambahbaik penulisan saya hasil maklumbalas membina yang diterima. Sungguhpun pembentangan dalaman itu rutin di jabatanku, yang pasti ia sesuatu yang besar bagi setiap pembentang yang mengambil giliran. Kami pasti menepuk bahu dan memberi kata semangat kepada pembentang pada setiap sesi. Ada yang menyatakan jika kita melakukan pembentangan dalam Seminar PhD di jabatan dan mock viva pada akhir pengajian serta melepasinya, peluang akan menjadi sangat cerah utk viva sebenar. Mudah-mudahan. Satu perkara lagi yang membakar semangatku ialah apabila mendapat tahu kawan yang baru sahaja bergraduasi telah berjaya menerbitkan tesisnya melalui penerbitan Kluwer. Alangkah besarnya kejayaan tersebut. Aku berdoa agar aku juga dapat menjejak langkah tersebut.

Misi selanjutnya ialah membuat persiapan terakhir utk ke persidangan di Germany dan menyudahkan penulisan bab yang amat mencabar saya ini.

Oh, salji tidak turun tahun ini...

2012-01-03T08:01:00.000-08:00

Sudah beberapa hari saya tidak menjengah ke luar tingkap dan menyemak ramalan cuaca Dundee di laman web. Sekarang sudah masuk bulan Januari dan salji masih belum turun. Pada tahun lepas, salji turun seawal bulan November. Masih kuat di dalam ingatan saya kepingan salji yang turun dengan lebatnya dibawah sorotan lampu taman kampus. Ketika itu saya baru sahaja tamat kelas gantian. Terus saya keluarkan telefon bimbit saya mencari punat video untuk merakam saat yang istimewa itu. Terkial-kial saya cuba memadam beberapa rakaman lama untuk memuatkan yang baru. Taman yang sebelumnya dipenuhi rumput basah dan pokok-pokok tidak berdaunn itu berubah menjadi lanskap putih dari setiap penjuru dalam hanya sejam. Suasana menjadi senyap, hening dan damai. Litupan salji telah menyerap semua bunyi.Itulah suasana yang dirindui.

Rupa-rupanya,salji lebat pada tahun 2010 itu adalah yang terburuk dalam rekod beberapa dekad. Salji turun berhari-hari. Sekolah dan universiti terpaksa ditutup sementara. Hanya jalan-jalan utama sahaja yang beroperasi. Kereta kami tidak dapat dikeluarkan dari masjid. Arahan telah dikeluarkan oleh pihak council untuk berada di dalam rumah masing-masing.

Salji, seperti api, apabila kecil menjadi kawan, apabila besar menjadi lawan. Salji menjadi bahaya sekiranya kita tidak mengenakan pakaian yang cukup tebal dan sesuai. Tangan dan kaki mudah menjadi sejuk dan kejang (frost) jika terdedah kepada sejuk terlalu lama. Bahaya lain ialah ais beku (black ice) atas jalan yang menyukarkan pemanduan dan pejalan kaki. Begitu juga bahaya runtuhan salji (avalanche) dari bumbung bangunan atau tanah tinggi. Ais beku dan runtuhan salji lazimnya berlaku apabila salji mula mencair.

Salji pada lanskap Dundee adalah amat cantik. Pokok-pokok besar dan kecil, gunang-ganang, rumah dan jalan yang dilitupi salji menghasilkan pemandangan yang benar-benar berbeza dan segar. MasyaAllah.

Pada tahun ini, kami bercuti krismas di rumah sahaja. Tambahan pula, saya mempunyai beberapa tugasan yang perlu disiapkan sebelum menghadiri persidangan pada akhir bulan Januari. Ada target yang perlu dicapai sebelum musim bunga!

Sila jgn balik rumah selagi belum siap bahagian 3.2

2011-08-09T05:47:00.001-07:00

(Trans: Please do not go home unless 3.2 is done!)

Saya turun lebih awal ke ofis. Harapnya dpt pulang awal juga sebab saya tahu dlm pukul 3 ptg bulan puasa ni, kepala rasa mcm dah nak switch off dah tentang research. Tapi saya tahu sebaiknya jika kita berehat sekalipun, research tu jgn switch off sepenuhnya. Biarlah pada suhu tempe.hehehe.

Ada beberapa bahagian lagi yang belum siap. Saya target nak hantar bulan puasa ni juga, supaya paling kurang boleh beraya sehari dua dengan aman dan berprogress. Raya berprogress. Walaupun selepas tu, pasti ada komen membina dari SV.

Selamat berbuka!

Sorotan Ramadhan

2011-08-05T03:37:00.000-07:00

Teringat semasa pertama kali berbuka di asrama banat, IUA Sudan. Saya baru beberapa minggu tiba di Sudan. Para pelajar dikumpulkan di luar bangunan yang ditutupi pagar tinggi.
'Malizi, Somali...Yallah!'
Kedengaran wakil pelajar menjerit meminta wakil dari setiap negara mengambil dulang masing-masing.
Terdapat beberapa orang pelajar Malaysia yang sedang menuntut di situ. Alhamdulillah, ada juga tunjuk ajar ekspres yang aku perolehi dari mereka. Kebanyakannya adalah tunjuk ajar untuk mengharungi kehidupan seharian di asrama itu khususnya dan di Sudan amnya.

Saya melihat dulang yang dibawa Kak Nini. Beberapa biji kurma kering, tujuh batang roti yang agak keras, kuah dan beberapa ketul daging dan tujuh gelas air karkadeh.
'Fadhilah, di sini, inilah menu berbuka puasa kita. Esok, insyaAllah mungkin ada nasi' kata Kak Nini yang sudah beberapa tahun berpengalaman di asrama itu.Mungkin dia telah terlihat reaksi saya terhadap komposisi makanan tersebut.
'Tapi hari ni Kak Nuha ada bawa sambal yang baru dibuat di sutuh (bumbung)tadi' kata Kak Nuha.
Itulah pengalaman pertama saya berbuka di perantauan setelah 18 tahun berbuka di samping keluarga atau asrama di Malaysia. Tidak pernah saya lihat hidangan seringkas ini. Di dalam hati saya terdetik juga samada saya akan kenyang dengan makanan sebegini. Namun Alhamdulillah, saya teringat tujuan abah dan mak saya hantar saya ke situ. Bukannya abah tidak tahu kehidupannya yang serba kekurangan, bukannya dia tidak tahu cuaca yang begitu panas di situ. Namun, beliau yakin yang anaknya boleh mengharunginya dan boleh belajar darinya. Ya, jika kesenangan relatif yang aku inginkan sudah tentu aku minta abahku menghantarku ke Jordan atau Kuwait, ataupun dibatalkan sahaja niatnya itu.
Saya menjamah makanan tersebut. Saya menjumpai keenakan di dalam makanan yang serba sederhana itu. Menakjubkan. Saya juga dapati betapa mudahnya untuk saya rasa bersyukur pada waktu itu. Ya, lebih asas sesuatu hidangan itu, lebih kerdil yang dirasakan. Saya lihat pelajar Afrika lain makan dengan gembira seolah-olah tiada kekurangan pun pada hidangan tersebut. Hanya beberapa suap yang singgah di mulut saya, saya sudah rasa kenyang. Ya Allah, itulah berkatnya makanan. Ah, kenapa saya perlu rasa bongkak pada awalnya?

Saya tertanya -tanya mampukah saya mengekalkan keinsafan tersebut?
Ya Allah permudahkanlah jalan kami untuk membina talian yang kuat denganMu melalui rezeki yang Engkau berikan.

Berbuka di Rumah

2011-08-02T16:28:00.000-07:00

Hari ini kami decide nak berbuka di rumah. Lauk hari ini ialah ikan makarel bakar, air asam dan ulam pegaga. Alhamdulillah.

Selepas solat tarawikh, Zulfa dan Muadz sempat belajar satu baris dari Surah Al-Baqarah.

Iftar

2011-08-02T16:19:00.000-07:00

Semalam saya sempat menyediakan popiah goreng bersalut cili manis dan bijan sebagai juadah berbuka puasa di masjid.

Kuih ini orang melayu sahaja yang gemar. Orang arab yang menjamah kuih ini di masjid semalam, seperti yang saya agak, tidak menghabiskannya. 'Gula bersama cili'will never work for them!

Zulfa dan Muadz bersedia ke masjid.

Tadarus al-Quran, bacaan dibuat secara bergilir.

Reflection- Summer Trip 2011

2011-07-28T10:01:00.000-07:00

Our last trip brought as to Inveraray, Glencoe and Oban, and so this time we decided to go further up north to see Fort William and Inverness. We took the familiar route to Glencoe and enjoyed the summer version of the three sisters and the beautiful landscape surrounding it. I caught a glimpse of Glen Orchy and thanks to the map, I didn't allow such must see views to escape my sight.

Just opposite the Glencoe Ski Centre, one particular sight caught my interest. I have seen this before during winter, but it surprised me that looking at it the second time still stored as much passion and interest as before. It was this extraordinary landscape of black soil and white sticks which looked like remains of animal bones all the way across the horizon. Most, it reminded me of the description of the end of time, when people will be resurrected and judged of their deeds. Allahuakbar.

There was no way we were able to stop to snap some pictures as for the narrow and winding road.

Just a further bit up after Fort William, we climbed Ben Nevis (practically no, but technically yes), by a gondola. Clever.
And Why Ben Nevis?
Because it is the highest mountain in the British Isles (at least, according to Wikipedia). For mountain lovers, this is a spot which they must experience, canvassing different view each season.

Inverness- is a city at nearly the very end of the British map, before Stornoway and Shetland. I agree to this because there are indeed big supermarkets around including Morrisons, an airport and other facilities. A Swedish lady I met at our hostel made a point that because of Inverness being populated, it allows people to come and enjoy the Scottish wild landscape, something that is quite hard to do in Sweden - despite of it sharing the same climate. We saw B&Bs all the way and it seems that everybody is making good at tourism.

The best thing about this trip is when I got to tick, scribble and circle the places in my worn map. I believe the road has not changed a lot ever since anyone earlier came to Inverness. I believe that by the time I got the chance to chat with someone I know (who is already now in his 70s), we will still be able to talk about the same route and the same natural view. By the way, I find it still interesting to see the lambs on green patches of grass behave so well. Do they ever move?? I am still eyeing an opportunity to be under a tree, reading my book, with a pencil in my hand, surrounded closely by these beautiful lambs..and of course, a high quality picture of it!

Scotland and Lochs- inseparable. No wonder fishing is the next best thing (if not the best)in Scotland. Different here, you need to get permit for fishing. Hey wait a minute, isn't fish in the sea/ lake a common heritage, at least for residents? Perhaps they have environmental or regulatory explanations for this, as how feeding wild ducks are not allowed fearing it may be overpopulated (according to some). Kita orang Melayu main bantai je, itik belakang rumah sumbatlah apa pun, semuanya makan. Atau mungkin tidak ada statistik pembiakan itik di Malaysia?

Our journey concluded itself with another stroll 'in' the magestic view of Aviemore and Craingorm. It is as if we were transformed into a beautiful Aviemore postcard, or the other way around - postcards made real. So beautiful it was, I couldn't imagine how beautiful it must be in winter, but to drive on this narrow slope,it could be a nightmare in snow and possible avalanche! Just don't forget that last year was the worst snow in yeeeaars!

Reflection-
The experience was incredible,Masha Allah. We were walking around God's earth exactly on the pillars. Had not Allah created the mountains to hold the earth firm?
Should we not reflect the Quranic verse (Surah An-Naba' verse 7) that the mountains were erected as pillars? This quranic message sent shudders to me, reminding me how fragile the earth is, if Allah wills to take them down. (Surah Al-Zalzalah).

Buat Rendang pun ada Analytical Framework ke?

2011-07-28T09:51:00.000-07:00

Hari ini kami anjurkan pot-luck di ofis. Kawan saya dari Goa telah bersusah payah menyediakan rendang Melayu. Macam tak percaya!

For somebody who has never tasted Malay Rendang, I score it a respectable, fat 6 out 10!!
Juadah lain termasuklah nasi ayam, lasagna (Iran), salad sayur dan ayam belanda (Poland), Spring Roll (Vietnam) dan Mee Kati (Thailand. Alhamdulillah.

Pindah Ordinan 12 ke 39

2011-05-18T04:21:00.000-07:00

Selesai pembentangan dan sesi soal jawab di hadapan tiga orang panel penilai, saya diminta keluar dari bilik pembentangan dan masuk kembali untuk mendengar keputusan. Saya rasa suasana formal sengaja dibuat suapaya pelajar mendapat gambaran awal tentang proses viva apabila selesai penulisan kelak. Alhamdulillah saya sudah diisytiharkan berpindah dari ordinan 12 ke ordinan 39 tanpa syarat (upgraded to PhD Ordinance). Saya tersenyum lebar sewaktu mendengar keputusan tersebut. Namun demikian, terdapat juga beberapa pemerhatian untuk penambahbaikan yang perlu diambil perhatian.

Adakah patut saya bergembira? Ya sudah tentu. Bukankah itu matlamat terhampir saya sebaik melangkah mendaftarkan diri sebagai pelajar di sini? Dan bukankah itu juga bahan ugutan jika saya tidak menunjukkan pencapaian yang baik sepanjang tempoh percubaan? Dan bukankah kebimbangan itu yang mengukir wajah muram pada musim bunga yang menemuiku buat kali kedua, menandakan genap setahun saya berada di sini ?

Pagi itu terasa damai sekali. Kini saya boleh menikmati musim bunga dengan lebih bermakna. Musim bunga dan musim seterusnya akan saya gunakan sebaiknya, InsyaAllah.Masih jauh perjalanannya. Allah musta'an.

Gaya Penulisan

2011-04-13T08:09:00.000-07:00

Selagi kita tidak benarkan orang lain membaca kerja kita, selagi itu kita tidak tahu tabiat kita dalam penulisan, terutamanya tabiat-tabiat yang mengganggu pembacaan. Memang pada awalnya saya berasa segan untuk menunjukkan penulisan kita kepada kawan-kawan sebidang, tapi apabila difikirkan semula, saya sepatutnya menghilangkan rasa malu tersebut dan berlapang dada menerima kritikan. Lagipun, penulisan kita akan dibaca juga oleh panel penilai, dan sudah tentu kita tidak mahu menerima kritikan terkumpul, yg berkemungkinan menyedihkan kita. Justeru, saya benarkan beberapa kawan melihat kerja saya.

Gaya penulisan bagaimana yang dikatakan baik di dalam undang-undang? Ada penulisan seperti gaya hakim bercakap atau peguam berhujah, ada pula yang lebih suka ayat-ayat yang ringkas dan tepat. Namun, saya jarang melihat gaya penulisan ringkas di dalam undang-undang. Adakah penulisan ringkas tidak sesuai dlm bidang ini dan mematikan keterampilannya (elegance)? Adakah itu yg dikatakan egoistik di dalam penulisan undang-undang? Saya masih lagi mencari gaya yang sesuai. Saya sudah terlampau terbiasa membaca penghujahan dan penulisan yang panjang dan berkoma-koma berbanding noktah. Saya juga terpengaruh dengan penulisan menggunakan ayat-ayat pasif (menurut penilaian seorang kawan). Saya harap saya mendapat rentaknya tepat pada masanya.

Kek tak semena-mena

2011-03-16T16:51:00.000-07:00

Entah macam mana jadi sebijik kek kopi kacang walnut yang besar. Ada dua biji kek yang dilapiskan. Pagar coklat ditepi adalah utk menutup permukaan yang tidak rata. Maklumlah, saya belum ada spatula dan beg piping sendiri.

Adakah eksperimen ini akan disusuli dgn kek -kek lain?

perpustakaan dan ofis sendiri

2011-03-06T09:10:00.000-08:00

Demi mengekalkan momentum, saya gagahkan juga ke perpustakaan. Bukan senang hendak menukar mood hari ahad, lebih-lebih lagi selepas pulang dari carboot. Tapi, di dalam fikiran saya, idea sedang menari-nari, maka tidak wajarlah saya membiarkannya.

Alhamdulillah, ilham sebegini tidak dtg selalu.

Saya menanggalkan beg yang disandang untuk mencari tempat duduk yg kosong. Sambil-sambil itu saya juga menjenguk tempat fotostet kalau-kalau tiada orang. Saya memilih meja karel bersebelahan tingkap kaca besar.

Tetapi sejak bila pula perpustakaan jadi hiruk pikuk. Di sebalik meja karel kedengaran suara hembusan hingus sekuat hati setiap setengah minit. Di belakang saya pelajar cina tanah besar sedang berbual dengan rancaknya melalui telefon. Di sebelah kanan saya dua orang pelajar scottish ber skype menggunakan laptop. Dan nun di sebelah utara barat saya beberapa pelajar Afrika sedang berdebat sesuatu. Mujurlah saya boleh menelaah walaupun bingit begitu. Mungkin juga kerana saya sudah mula memahami undang-undang EU dalam konteks kerja saya yang selama ini sgt memeningkan kepala. Jika saya berada di rumah, sudah tentu saya sudah tidur atau bermain puzzle dengan muadz yang baru dapat dua set puzzle baru dari carboot.

Tidak mengapa, hari sabtu dan ahad sahaja saya berkemungkinan menelaah di perpustakaan (main library). Itupun jika tiada aktiviti komuniti atau aktiviti senggang lain. Hari-hari biasa saya berada di ofis pelajar PhD di bangunan berasingan ataupun di perpustakaan undang-undang. Di ofis kami, keadaan adalah amat berbeza. Sebatang pen sahaja jatuh, kami akan kata 'Sorry'. Jika ada telefon yang lupa dimatikan atau dimod senyapkan berbunyi, kami akan kata 'Sorry', dan terus keluar dari ofis tersebut.Jika ada perbincangan yg agak panjang, kami akan berbual di luar. Kadang-kadang, jika kami bersembang juga, akan kedengaran bunyi suara berbisik dan gelak-gelak kecil sahaja. Sudah tradisi begitu di ofis kami. Sehinggakan ada kawan kami berdengkur, dengkurannya terdengar begitu kuat sekali di dalam ofis itu. Oh ya, tidak lupa juga bunyi perut. Itu yang menyebabkan saya terpaksa pulang awal pada bulan puasa atau ganti puasa kerana perut berbunyi amat kuat. Ia tidak mengganggu orang, tapi saya yang tidak selesa apabila didengar orang. Di sini perut berbunyi adalah normal, mungkin kerana cuaca yang berangin. Untuk mengelakkannya, orang sini kata makan oat...dan kalau ikut sunnah nabi Muhammad s.a.w kunyah makanan betul-betul dan jangan makan terlampau laju, insyaAllah perut tidak kembung atau berangin.

Ofis kami buka juga pada hari sabtu dan ahad, tetapi orang tidak ramai dan koridornya gelap. Saya juga takut menggunakan lif, bimbang sangkut dan tiada orang yang dpt datang selamatkan.

Saya telah berjaya memfotostet sebahagian buku yang diberi pinjam oleh penyelia saya. Ada lagi satu buku inter-library loan yang belum saya buat salinan. Kalau di Malaysia sudah tentu saya tinggalkan sahaja buku tu di kedai fotostet BBB dan kutip kemudian. Tak payah pening kepala. Di sini saya kena fotostet sendiri. Sangat letih. Kalau tak fotostet, bimbang pula buku itu diperlukan lagi dan nak pinjam semula melalui interlibrary loan susah pula. Saya amat berterimakasih kepada penyelia saya yang tidak pernah lokek memberi pinjam buku. Saya tidak minta, dia yang sungguh-sungguh suruh saya rujuk.

Sampai sahaja di rumah, saya buka peti dan keluarkan smoked makarel. Saya bakar smoked makarel tu dan buat air asam. Lepas tu makan dgn nasi panas-panas....sedapnya masha allah.

Crossing the bridge first

2011-03-02T17:33:00.000-08:00

Semasa hendak membuat keputusan ke UK, macam-macam perkara yg kami ambil kira..seperti macam mana kalau seniority hilang, macam mana kalau tak sambung belajar dua-dua...tapi apabila surat tawaran ke UK datang, suami saya kata, insyaAllah ada hikmahnya dan untuk sekarang kita seberang jambatan ini dulu ( 'cross the bridge first'). Itulah yang kami lakukan.

Kita memang tidak dapat meramal masa hadapan, kita hanya mampu merancang.

Kalau kita berasa takut dengan satu benda yang besar di hadapan kita, kita seberang dulu jambatan berdekatan kita.

Dan InsyaAllah, semuanya disandarkan kepada Allah s.w.t.

Hari ini saya telah menyeberangi satu jambatan. Saya telah membuat pembentangan penyelidikan saya di dalam seminar PhD. Seminar ini diadakan setiap dua minggu. Dan pada setiap dua minggu kami akan mengucapkan selamat maju jaya kepada pembentang. Biasanya yang membentang akan terus melangkah ke peringkat seterusnya samada untuk tujuan penaiktarafan status pelajar atau viva. Dan pada setiap dua minggu itu saya membayangkan diri saya di tempat pembentang.

Dengan hati yang tekad saya menetapkan tarikh saya untuk pembentangan sebulan awal. Saya tahu saya tidak akan bersedia jika tarikh tidak ditentukan. Kawan saya dari Iran yang daftar sbg pelajar lebih awal dari saya mengucapkan terima kasih kerana dia juga telah mendapat semangat untuk menetapkan tarikh selepas melihat saya berbuat demikian. Bagus juga kerana saya ada kawan untuk sama-sama memberikan motivasi. Dan itulah yang berlaku dalam masa sebulan itu. Kami pastikan kami berjumpa dengan kedua-dua penyelia kami dan kami bertukar-tukar pandangan mengenai penyelidikan masing-masing. Saya telah membuat pembentangan olok-olok dan dirakamkan, dia juga melakukannya, malahan dia telah sempat menjemput kawan-kawan lain dari pusat lain yang telah memberikan maklumbalas yang sangat bernas. Saya tidak sempat berbuat demikian.

Hari pembentangan tiba. Saya yang membentang dahulu. Saya takut dan di dalam hati saya, saya tidak henti-henti memujuk hati, memandang tepat kepada audien yang mula membanjiri seminar. Kami sama-sama mengucapkan selamat maju jaya.

Kawan arab saya menitipkan doa penenang dan pencerah hati.

Permulaan yang baik. Walaubagaimanapun di tengah-tengah saya dapat rasa suara saya bergetar dan termengah. Adakah suara saya terlalu kuat menyebabkan saya rasa macam sesak nafas? Oh saya rasa saya perlukan latihan fizikal utk stamina. Membentang pun perlu fizikal yang fit. Saya hanya berharap getaran itu tidak ketara. Bibir saya juga kering. Saya mengumpul kekuatan saya melalui semangat ingin menyampaikan, dan dari wajah-wajah pemberi semangat yang menaruh setinggi harapan supaya saya bertahan. Saya melawan semua kekusutan mental yang bersarang dan cuba bertenang menyebut dalam lidah asing. Akhirnya pembentangan berakhir.

Tepukan yang kuat. Saya tidak pasti itu tepukan semangat atau kerana pencapaian yang baik. Saya berharap keduanya.

Alhamdulillah.
Saya mendapat maklumbalas yang baik - walaupun saya tahu jika saya berpeluang melakukannya semula saya akan bunuh ketakutan itu sehabisnya. Untuk empat puluh minit seterusnya saya berhadapan dengan sesi soal jawab. Sesi soal jawab itu sangat berharga utk saya perbaiki mutu penyelidikan bagi tujuan penaiktarafan kelak.

Kawan saya juga telah melaluinya dengan jaya.
Kini kami mengatur untuk menyeberang jambatan yang seterusnya bersama.

For You S.A.W

2011-02-24T08:52:00.000-08:00

I wrote this poem remembering my mom and myself with my children. We know almost the whole life of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. In fact he was the only one in his time that we have that much of information. Companions around him s.a.w narrated his entire life. We even know him before his birth, how he ate, talked, diplomatic affairs. Should we not feel him near?

Its Maulidur Rasul again. Peace be upon you, O Messenger of Allah:

For You S.A.W

My mommy told me before tucking me in bed

The stories about you

My mommy held me and whispered in my ear

To be exactly like you

Your face was bright

Your speech was clear

Your laughter was but a smile

Your sayings are only what are right

Which makes people hold you dear

And your stories travelled across time and miles

My mommy stopped me before eating

To recite the dua taught by you

My mommy held me from quarrelling

And told me that you would never argue, its just not you

My mommy repeated about you again and again

I just keep wondering why

She looked deep into my eyes

You were the beloved one, and that was the reply

Your birth was awaited

Known by those who had knowledge

You were placed in the best family existed

With the best upbringing nurtured

You never spoke but truth

You were the most trusted

You were chosen even before prophethood

Brought peace to the Quraish, when bloodshed could have stood

My mommy talked about your children,

How you loved and taught them,

To love you is indeed

To love those around you, whom you have taken lead

My mommy said that we are in the end of times

And in the end of times we are

And so to the utmost faith I am asked to climb

Holding on you and what you say, you promised that God will protect me from straying afar

How my mommy’s eyes sparkled

When I was able to read on my own

Its the Quran, your greatest miracle

Thanks mommy for teaching, my interest has grown!

Now that I am a older

Its time for me to reflect

Those were not just stories

But for me to act

If you were here today

Would we be the same?

Pray as how you prayed

Or let the world play its game?

If you were here today

Where would we be?

Beside you, holding steadfast

Or among the reluctant and those of the last?

If you were here today

You’ll see us named after you

But how many of us dare to say

My heart, my life, my death are all exemplifying you?

Your Grace sallallahu alaihi wasallam

20 Rabiul Awal 1432H

(More than 1400 years after)

Dundee, Scotland

Dari Braveheart ke Salahuddin Al-Ayubi

2011-02-14T08:29:00.000-08:00

Baru sahaja ingin merehatkan badan, tv menayangkan pula cerita Braveheart. Entah kali berapa saya menonton cerita ini, setiap kali tgk, mesti dah tak boleh buat kerja lain. Tapi menonton kali ini berbeza kerana dialek scotland sudah tidak asing, begitu juga dgn sejarah dan landscapenya (glen dan loch yg begitu cantik di Scotland ini). Beberapa tempat yang diceritakan didalam legend itu juga sudah dilawati seperti Stirling, Fife etc. Saya semak semula sejarah berkaitan Wallace dan Bruce. Ada beberapa perkara yang kurang tepat digambarkan di dalam cerita Braveheart- Mel Gibson pun kata ia adalah satu legend sahaja). Contohnya Isabella (isteri Edward II berbangsa Perancis) sepatutnya belum lagi berada di England ketika zaman Wallace, justeru mustahil mereka dpt bertemu, apatah lagi berkemungkinan mengandungkan waris monarki inggeris. Walaubagaimanapaun, kebanyakan bahagian lain adalah selari dgn sejarah. Bruce memang pernah belot dan menarik tentera dari tentera Wallace, tetapi kemudiannya menyambung perjuangan Wallace dan merebut kembali takhtanya sebagai raja di Scotland .

Mengimbau sejarah Scotland, kita juga tidak boleh lupa, pada waktu itu kerajaan Islam sedang menghadapi ancaman tentera bersalib dari eropah bersatu. Robert Bruce kalau ikut sejarah memang memberikan banyak sumbangan merebut Baitulmaqdis dari orang Islam.

Kebencian orang eropah terhadap orang Islam amat jitu apabila paderi kristian Peter Hermit berjaya menyemarakkannya dgn memfitnah orang Islam membunuh orang Kristian, mendera dan sebagainya. Walhal, dalam Islam, Nabi Muhammad s.a.w telah menggariskan undang -undang peperangan yang adil dan tidak menzalimi yang telah dipatuhi oleh sahabat-sahabat baginda (radhiyallahu anhum) dan panglima-panglima yang lain. Undang-undang siyar itu adalah lebih terdahulu dari pelbagai Geneva Conventions yang baru diperkenalkan di dalam undang-undang kemanusiaan antarabangsa pada hari ini. Pada waktu itu, orang-orang eropah masih di dalam zaman medieval, tiada undang-undang perang yang jelas. Undang-undang hal peperangan telah diserahkan oleh Pope kepada panglima-panglima tentera bersalib. Akibatnya, ketika mereka berjaya menakluki jerusalem, lebih kurang 90 thn sebelum Salahuddin Al-Ayubi, mereka telah membunuh beribu-ribu orang Islam termasuk kanak-kanak, wanita dan orang tua.

Salahuddin Al-Ayubi menebus kembali jerusalem selepas peperangan Hittin. Tawanan perang di berikan layanan yang baik, Mereka amat tidak menyangka mereka mendapat layanan sebegitu rupa setelah apa yang mereka lakukan kepada orang Islam selama hampir 90 thn yang lalu.

Para sejarawan barat juga tidak menyangkal kehebatan Salahuddin Al-Ayubi. Mereka tidak mempunyai pilihan melainkan terpaksa akur kepada kebaikan, keagungan dan kehandalan Salahuddin dalam berperang. Panglima mereka tidak dapat menandingi keperibadian Salahuddin. Paling memalukan ialah apabila raja Richard dari England membunuh 1000 orang tawanan Islam yang terdiri dari kanak-kanak, wanita dan orang tua sedangkan perjanjian damai sedang dilakukan. Ini menyemarakkan semangat tentera Muslim dan terus mengumpulkan kekuatan merebut kembali Jerusalem.

Allah menurunkan bantuan kepada tentera Salahuddin dgn menggoyahkan kekuatan tentera eropah bersatu. Raja Jerman telah mati lemas dan beratus ribu tenteranya bersurai. Yang tinggal adalah tentera dibawah raja Richard dari England dan raja Philip dari Perancis yang curiga di antara satu sama lain.

Dan hari ini, rakyat palestin menunaikan fardhu kifayah mereka tinggal di Palestin dan mempertahankannya. Hari ini, kerajaan-kerajaan arab Islam di negara-negara jiran seakan tidak melihat kesengsaraan tersebut, sama seperti kerajaan2 Islam pada zaman Salahuddin dahulu yang membiarkan perjuangan itu dilakukan oleh tentera2 Salahuddin. Cumanya, hari ini umat Islam berhadapan secara langsung dengan orang Yahudi (dahulu org Yahudi berperanan secara senyap melagakan orang kristian dengan orang Islam dalam perang salib). Akan ada lagikah pahlawan seperti Salahuddin Al-Ayubi sebelum kemunculan Imam Mahdi?

Salju Pencari Ilmu

2011-01-05T04:14:00.001-08:00

seketika aku terlihat sinarmu mentari

disebalik bangunan inggeris ini

membuktikan

kedinginan salju ini tidak menghalangmu keluar

seolah-olah engkau datang menjengukku seketika

disebalik cermin kaca

di dalam bongkah ilmu

memberikan perangsang buat diriku

yang memerlukan semangat untuk terus mara

dan aku

adakah kedinginan salju ini juga bukan penghalangku

menabur baris kata-kata

dalam kepayahan lidah asing

dalam selautan ilmu yang belum kuteroka

kelihatan semakin dalam

semakin asing

oh adakah ini perjalanan

sang pencari ilmu?

Dundee

Main Library

1Disember 2010

Melihat keindahan Scotland

2011-01-04T13:44:00.000-08:00

Ketika orang putih di sini menyambut krismas dan new year, kami beberapa keluarga mengambil kesempatan untuk menggunakan masa cuti tersebut mengenali dengan lebih dekat Scotland. Kali ini, trip kami meliputi kawasan sebelah barat Scotland, selari dengan Dundee, iaitu ke Inveraray, Oban, Glencoe dan akhirnya turun ke bawah sikit iaitu Glasgow. Trip ini hampir dibatalkan berikutan salji yang sangat lebat dan pengalaman memandu yang terbatas. Tambahan pula, ahli kami yang handal dalam bab kereta sudahpun kembali ke Malaysia beberapa bulan yang lalu. Entah dari mana dtgnya semangat tu, saya lihat ahli2 trip ni semakin berkobar-kobar untuk pergi apabila tarikh semakin dekat. Jadi kami merancang dengan teliti segala keperluan dan persediaan yang diperlukan sebelum dan semasa trip tersebut termasuklah servis kereta, beli peta bagi yang belum ada utk back up garmin/satnav/tom tom etc, mencari poskod dan lokasi tempat dituju, menu utk dimasak secara berkumpulan dan bahan-bahannya dan lain-lain.

Seperti yang dijangka, kami terpaksa menempuh jalan yang diliputi salji pada awal perjalanan keluar dari Dundee. Kereta tidak boleh dipandu laju, dan jika perlu brek, tidak boleh brek mengejut. Subhanallah, pemandangan jalan dan bandar-bandar kecil diliputi salji adalah amat indah sekali.

Ini adalah contoh bandar kecil yang diseliputi salji.
Jalan jadi comot sebab garam yang ditabur utk mencairkan salji.
Lokasi: Antara Perth dan Crief, route A85.

Sejurus sampai di Inveraray, kami melawat penjara lama Inveraray. Penjara pun jadilah, sebab tak banyak tempat yang dibuka pada musim sejuk. Penjara ini kecil sahaja, tapi agak informative - diceritakan bagaimana pesalah disabit (petty crimes seperti mencuri gandum, jam tangan) dan hukumannya, serta kemudahan di dalam penjara dalam era 1800s. Ala, lebih kurang mcm Penang waktu mula-mula British rampas dulu, ada legal chaos, tunggu Charter of Justice dari England, sementara tu mcm2la hukuman pelik2 yang dijatuhkan.

Penjara ini juga sering dikunjungi oleh ghost seekers, dan mereka dibenarkan bermalam disitu.

Ini adalah dapur penjara.

Dlm penjara ini juga ada court room, diperdengarkan hearing yang dirakam.

Kami sampai di Inveraray agak awal, jadi kami terpaksa cari port utk makan tengahari dan solat zuhur.Oleh itu kami kumpulkan sahaja makanan di boot kereta salah seorang ahli dan buffet sahaja. Semua orang makan dalam kereta masing-masing sebab terlampau sejuk. Kami juga solat di dalam kereta kerana tiada tempat yang sesuai di sekitar.

Rancangan kami ke Hollow Mountain, Cruachan gagal kerana tidak dibuka. Kami meneruskan perjalanan seterusnya ke Oban.

Sempat juga kami berhenti tepi jalan untuk ambil gambar sekitar Cruachan. Perhatikan di belakang kami air sudah mula membeku dibahagian tepi, manakala yang lainnya mengalir dibahagian tepi.

Oban ialah bandar kecil yang menjadi tarikan pelancong kerana kecantikannya dan jeti yang menghubungkannya dengan destinasi pelancongan yang lain seperti Isle of Mull.

McCaig's Tower

Kami sempat berjalan di bandar Oban dan singgah di kedai charity (itu aje yang mampu), untuk cari selipar. Malangnya harga di kedai charity adalah lebih mahal berbanding di Dundee. Zulfa dan Muadz sempat jugak beli buku dan mainan yang harganya kurang dua pound.

Keesokan harinya kami memandu menuju ke Glencoe untuk bermain salji (padahal salji di Dundee jauh lebih lebat berbanding Glencoe pada waktu tersebut). Walaubagaimanapun, keindahan Glencoe sukar ditandingi tempat-tempat lain di Scotland. Malangnya hari sudah gelap ketika kami berupaya berhenti untuk mengambil gambar. Biarlah pemandangan gunung-ganang bagai landskap lukisan itu terpahat dalam kepala sahaja. Lain kali ada rezeki, boleh pergi lagi dan boleh lajak ke Fort William yang belum pernah kami kunjungi. Dengarnya Fort William elok dikunjungi pada musim panas. Di Glencoe, kami naik ke atas gunung menggunakan chairlift dan melihat orang putih mengangkut peralatan ski mereka. Seram juga naik chairlift tu sebab bergantung kepada satu palang je utk keselamatan. Alhamdulillah semuanya selamat.

Pemandangan menarik dlm perjalanan ke Glencoe.

Lokasi: Glen Orchy, route dalam towards Glencoe. Tidak dinasihatkan melalui jalan ini pada waktu malam - sempit, sunyi dan tiada lampu.

Ini adalah pemandangan dari atas chairlift. Air terjun yang beku. Subhanallah. Semuanya mudah bagi Allah swt.

Chairlift. Seram nak bawak keluar kamera dan melepaskan tangan dari palang keselamatan.

Setiap kali pulang ke Youth Hostel, Inveraray, kami bekerjasama memasak. Sedap sungguh, antara menunya sepanjang cuti tersebut - ikan masin, tomyam, kerutub, kerabu mangga dan daging, nasi tomato, ikan bakaq, ayaq asam....pertandingan cheesecake pun ada, dan kamilah yang menang...heheh

kerabu mangga

Pasembor

yg main scrabble sambil makan pun ada.

Sebelum meninggalkan Inveraray, kami tidak melepaskan peluang ambil gambar di tempat2 yang dirasakan menarik.

Alhamdulillah perjalanan adalah lancar dan kami dapat melihat sebahagian kecantikan semulajadi yang terkumpul di Scotland. Perjalanan sebegini adalah lebih baih dari melihat ketinggian bangunan (yang tertinggi atau terbesar atau tercantik etc) yang melambangkan keangkuhan manusia. Cantik sungguh, tak ada perkataan dah nak gambarkan, dan pemandangan juga berbeza dalam setiap musim yang berbeza. Subhanallah.

Balik ni kena pegang buku la....

krisis sinki

2010-11-04T01:47:00.000-07:00

7.45am
"alamak sinki tersumbatlah"
"sikit je kot, cuba jolok kot-kot ada benda terlekat"
dapur masih berselerak dengan pinggan yang belum dibasuh. sinki pula buat hal.lepas hantar Zulfa, suami aku pergi dua tiga buah kedai cari pam. sempat lagi dia telefon aku suruh cari dalam kamus apa exact word untuk pam. aku pun cari: 'plunger', 'sink plunger'. kalau dialek scottish, cuba ikut huruf 'u' tu betul-betul...

10.00am
suami aku buka paip dibawah sinki. Air mengalir dengan banyak. Dengan cepat aku cari baldi. empat buah baldi sekaligus.
"mana kita nak buang air ni?
"dalam lubang jamban boleh kot"kata suamiku.
"tapi tadi bila flush jamban waktu siapkan zulfa, saya nampak air naik di sinki."
aku tidak pasti itu adalah khayalan atau imaginasiku semata-semata. khayalan dan imaginasi sama la...tapi aku pasti air memang naik, cuma yang tidak pastinya adakah itu kesan flush.
"alamak, takkanla ada kaitan dgn jamban pulak kot" keluh suamiku
langkah kami seterusnya ialah mengelak menggunakan jamban. kami sudah merangka-rangka yang kami akan menuju ke masjid sekiranya terdapat kecemasan yang hakiki.
"peliklah, air masih keluar dari sinki dengan banyak"
"cuba pakai dawai pada beg laundry, mcm boleh je"
beg laundry itu kami koyakkan untuk mendapatkan dawainya. Beberapa usaha menjolok menggunakan dawai telah dilakukan, tetapi paip itu kelihatan bersih dan tidak ada apa-apa yang membuatkannya tersumbat. suami aku terus pergi sekali lagi ke kedai hardware berdekatan mencari alat proper untuk mencungkil paip tersebut. Masih tiada hasil.

kami bermuhasabah cuba mencari punca kejadian ini.
"well maybe its rice or grease" kata assistant janitor yang buat tinjauan awal masalah sinki kami tu. Yakin benar dia bahawa puncanya ialah rice dan gris. mungkin sebab dia tengok muka asia aku ni. (dulu aku suka ckp muka aku ala mongol, tapi sejak kes altan.... tu, cantiklah pulak org mongol ni, so tak boleh lagi cakap ala-ala mongol nanti org kata perasan - selingan saja). Berbalik kepada krisis, apa yang dilakukan oleh assistant janitor tu lebih kurang sahaja dgn yg suami aku lakukan. Alih sinki di bawah dan membasahkan bajunya dengan air yang melimpah keluar.
"rice? no...i don't think so" kata aku. Aku memang sentiasa berhati-hati membasuh pinggan. aku letakkan khas penapis makanan di dalam sinki. permanent.semua lebihan makanan disaring di dalam penapis itu dan aku lalukan air diatasnya atau air lebihan basuh pinggan supaya bau makanan hilang sebelum dibuang di dalam tong sampah. Di malaysia aku juga lakukan yang sama kerana semut akan cepat sahaja mengerumuni makanan di dalam tong sampah jika tidak dilakukan demikian.

"grease, er..maybe.."sambungku...dlm kepalaku terbayang juga pinggan mangkuk berminyak yang aku basuh, kadang-kadang ada juga lebihan sup daging yang penuh dgn lemak tepu apabila ia menjadi sejuk. atau lebihan kari. atau pernahkah aku menuang minyak di dalamnya? argh, minyak yg aku buangkan pun aku lalukan dgn air panas sehingga menjadi amat cair. apa-apa pun, itu tetap minyak. sah. gris. tapi adakah puncanya aku? seram sejuk aku memikirkannya. kenapa tidak aku terfikir.cuaca di UK adalah sejuk dan sudah tentu cepat membekukan apa sahaja gris di dalam saluran paip.

sedar tidak sedar aku sudah meletakkan kesalahan pada bahu aku dan aku amat takut sekali. bagaimana kalau kerosakan ini serius? adakah flat 51 akan dikatakan membuat hal lagi? aku teringat bagaimana aku menerima surat amaran kerana meninggalkan bilik gunasama tanpa memastikan kebersihan bilik air perempuan. argh, budak-budak bermain tisu, kenapalah aku tidak berhati-hati? aku terus membalas surat tersebut memohon maaf agar perkara sama tidak berulang dan agar kemudahan itu dikekalkan seperti sedia kala. bilik gunasama itulah yang digunakan untuk kebanyakan program keramaian komuniti melayu di sini.

aku terbayang klausa 10.3 dalam perjanjian sewa rumah: ..."kalau terdapat sebarang kerosakan yang disebabkan oleh kamu (attributed to you), bayaran bil kerosakan boleh diserahkan kepada kamu untuk dibayar secara terus."
menyirap darah aku, aku rasa muka aku putih pucat sebab panik.

aku mula google dan cari kos bayaran plumber di UK - 140 pound, 200 pound, 300 pound, ikut jam, double kalau pada waktu malam. argh..ujian jenis apa ini? ujian yang teramat kecil Allah tunjukkan tapi cukup buat aku ketar satu hari. dan ujian debaran ini bertambah kerana aku tidak dapat menjangka bila ia akan berakhir.
"I will have to speak to Janet, and request a plumber."kata assistant janitor berjambang itu.
Janet? aku sudah terbayangkan rambutnya yang vogue dan wajahnya yang jarang menampakkan senyuman. ooh dimanakah janitor kesukaan kami Keith? mengapakah dia tiada pada saat kami memerlukan paling kurang muka yang manis?

"But I don't know when I will get things sorted out, I will have to go to the Tower Building." sambungnya lagi dengan pelat scottish pekat. Pelat mereka amat pekat dan kadang-kadang, silap-silap hanya 20% sahaja yang dpt difahami. maklumlah, bukankah sukar jika ayat tersbut ditukar dialek kepada terengganu seperti .."aku dok tahu bile nok buleh siak urusang ni, kekgi aku kne kerabak tower building pulok." doh guane???

"erm, do you think it has anything to do with the toilet as well? i flushed the toilet and saw water gushing out from the sink" kataku, sebahagiannya untuk memecahkan kesenyapan, selain divert penglihatan kami daripada assitant janitor yang duduk membongkok menunjukkan kehandalannya. haih, mat saleh ni tak boleh ke kalau tunduk tak menampakkan apa yang tak patut dinampakkan?? kami buat-buat tak nampak dan memang tak hingin nak tengok.

suamiku mengerlingku ingin menegurku supaya tidak bercakap apa yang tidak pasti. Assistant janitor tersebut mula mengambil maklumat yang aku berikan itu sebagai data. alamak, kang dia ingat toilet tu ada masalah pulak. tulah aku ni bukan jurutera nak berlagak jadi jurutera.

"yeah , probably, there may be a connection." dia rupanya telah membuat penakulan mantik. mampus! mesti dia ingat aku buang pad ke etc.
"is this a common problem?" nadaku semakin perlahan, apabila menyedari yang kami berada di dalam masalah.
"well, to be honest, its not common." katanya sambil senyum. argh, senyuman itu tidak dapat mengubati kesan halilintar respon yang diberi.

3.00 pm
Suamiku pergi ambil budak-budak dari sekolah. Aku membuka halaman-halaman buku International Trade Law aku..hati aku berkecamuk kerana aku terpaksa tuang kelas international dispute settlement. hmm..aku masih batuk teruk, jika bukan kerana masalah ini pun aku memang tidak dapat ke kelas. kudrat aku mengatakan yang aku boleh ke kelas tapi aku tak larat tahan kalau semua orang mengerling aku batuk seperti meyuruh aku blah sebelum menjangkiti mereka, atau minda aku diserang oleh arahan mengawal supaya jangan batuk dan tidak memberikan perhatian sewajarnya kepada pensyarah di hadapan. aku masih serik drama batuk aku di library semalam: i literally coughed on the face of the libararian despite trying to avoid it..bila dah gatal tekak tak boleh buat apa, melainkan aku batuk sekuat hati, tapi mana boleh buat begitu di libary. itu jugalah yang menyebabkan aku meminta diri di tengah-tengah kelas dgn alasan.."i'm ok, its just that i can't stop coughing", glemer sekejap.

Helaian buku aku buka satu-satu, tetapi satu pun tidak dapat menangkap perhatian aku. Aku buka pula kes Texaco v Libya dan meneleng-nelengkan kepalaku pada skrin laptop sebelum aku mengenalpasti dokumen pdf aku harus dirotatekan kearah kiri. oh, alangkah lambat penakulanku. Usaha membaca tidak berhasil kerana aku tetap nampak imej bongkah hitam bergris yang sumbat dalam paip.argh!!

Tiba-tiba aku terdengar desiran air. Melimpah! seperti spring aku bangkit dari kerusi menuju ke dapur. aku lantas mengosongkan sinki, empat lagi baldi dipenuhi air.aku tapis air tersebut, bimbang tub mandi pula yang tersumbat. terdapat sisa nasi dan sayur kecil yang masih hijau. ini bukan sisa makanan kami! ini tentu sisa air orang lain. air apa ini? aku terus cuba menggunakan daya imaginasiku dan ilmu kejuruteraan aku yang hampir tiada untuk membayangkan struktur paip dirumahku, namun dinding yang nyata telah membataskan imaginasi liarku.

"maknanya air yang keluar dari sinki ini tidak ada kena mengena dengan toilet kita"
"sudah tentu ini air orang atas." kata suamiku melalui telefon. sedikit lagi dia sampai di rumah bersama anak-anak.
"call main office, katakan air sudah melimpah."saran suamiku. aku cuba mengelat. aku tidak mahu membuat panggilan itu.
"nombor ada di papan kenyataan kita tu di belakang pintu." nampak gayanya aku kena juga buat panggilan tersebut.
"tak ada orang angkat." kataku dlm telefon.
"call lagi satu nombor, residence office." sarannya lagi. aku tiada pilihan.orang kata berani kerana benar. tapi bagaimana aku harus berani kalau aku ni tidaklah benar mana. orang bersalah memang begitu.aku tahu aku ni contributory to the problem, tapi aku terpaksa apply criminal law punya priciple utk menyedapkan hati walaupun amat tidak berkaitan|: bahawa causal link itu mestilah kerana aku dan tidak ada break of chain untuk attribute sesuatu kesalahan kpd aku utk menjadikan ia sebagai actus reus kesalahan ini.

Aku amat yakin bahawa paip aku berkongsi dgn empat flat di atas. Dan takungan itu berlaku di paip utama di bawah paip rumahku. Aku hanya berharap orang di flat atas juga kerap menggunakan dapur dan paip itu memang tidak pernah di servis.
"can you please hold on a minute, i will connect you to Janet" kata orang yang menjawab panggilan telefon. Janet???? aku menelan air liur.
"did you pour oil in the sink?" itu soalan pertama Janet. Oh dimanakah dia belajar art of killing? aku terasa segalanya tersangkut di kerongkong. aku terbayang ada juga insiden ' acara menuang minyak yang cair yg dilalukan dgn air panas'..aku memang tidak pandai menipu.

"erm..i'm not sure of that....but blah..blah.." aku tukar topic lain. nada Janet seperti menuduhku atau paling tidak pun membuatkan aku rasa bersalah.
"is there anything that you can do to wait until tomorrow morning? I will call a plumber if the problem still exist the first thing in the morning." katanya. dia kata laporan tidak sampai kepadanya dan seolahnya kedengaran seperti sudah terlalu lewat untuk memulakan isu yang baru. Isu ini sesungguhnya tidak baru, aku dan suamiku sudah letih berdiri di tepi sinki menyambut air yang melimpah. aku telah jelaskan yang kami sudah memanggil assistant janitor sejak tengahari lagi, walaupun sepagian kami cuba menyelesaikannya sendiri.Aku kemudiannya menyatakan keesediaan kami berdua utk 'watch the sink' sehingga esok hari.

letihla nak cerita.
namun aku tidak puas hati selagi tidak merekodkan bagaimana isu krisis sinki ini telah membuatkan mukaku pucat, kakiku ketar dan otakku serabut. argh!!! Teruskan.

5.00pm
"jadi kita kena tunggu macam ni sampai esok pagi ke?" rungut suamiku
"takut nak demand lebih-lebih kat Janet tu,takpe kot air tak melimpah kalau kita guard." kataku. sangkaanku meleset. air semakin banyak. sesekali air yang keluar berwarna pink, ada pula yang mengandungi kulit telur baru.
"tak pasal-pasal kita kena sambut air basuhan orang." kata suamiku. betul juga kata dia, yang penatnya dia juga. seperti biasa, suamiku yang gentleman itu sudah tentu tidak mahu saya buat kerja berat-berat.
"kita kena buat shift malam ni, kalau tidak air akan melimpah ke ruang tamu." katanya lagi. memang tidak mustahil perkara itu terjadi kerana air yang keluar kelihatan semakin banyak. maklumlah waktu tersebut adalah waktu makan malam. air tidak juga reda. jam sudah menunjukkan 8.00 mlm.

8.00mlm
"saya nak call Janet."kata suamiku
"jangan! apa yang dia boleh lakukan pd waktu malam begini?" kataku. oh, aku tidak mahu 'encounter' dengan Janet malam begini, lebih-lebih lagi memaksanya melakukan perkara yang mustahil.
"tetapi ini emergency." kata suamiku. suamiku membaca dgn kuat notis asrama ..'in case of an emergency, please call bla..bla.."inilah masanya utk apply.
"takkan kita nak berdiri macam ni sehingga pagi esok." suamiku terus mendail nombor telefon ofis yang berkaitan tetapi tiada jawapan. akhirnya telefon diangkat oleh pihak sekuriti.
"that sounds serious. I will call the plumber for you." kata sekuriti. suamiku tersenyum lebar. akhirnya plumber akan dtg.
" tak rasa mcm tindakan kita over ke? kalau kos itu 'attributed' kepada kita sudah tentu kosnya berlipat ganda kerana servisnya pada waktu malam." kataku meluahkan kerisauan.
"jgn risau, biar diorg investigate issue ni. kita jgn nak memandai-mandai. lagipun kerosakan itu di paip utama, bukannya paip kita." alhamdulillah, suamiku tenang sahaja menghadapi isu ini. ah, biarkan sahajalah dia menguruskan perkara ini. aku cuma perlu bantu untuk menjadi telinga kedua bagi memahami apa yang dikatakan oleh mat saleh dlm telor scottish pekat itu.

9.00pm
plumber dtg. muda, dlm lingkungan 20an. aku berkurung di dalam bilik dgn anak2 dan meneka-neka apa yang berlaku di luar. dia mengenalpasti masalah tersebut adalah di saluran utama. rupanya dia memang contractor universiti. dia juga telah mengesahkan bahawa bayaran dibuat oleh universiti.paling tidak pengesahan tersebut menyenangkan hati aku. ignore dulu apa-apa pengesahan kedua yg mungkin akan dibuat oleh Janet nanti. plumber tersebut sangat baik dan langsung tidak menyalahkan sesiapa. sudah tentulah dia suka, duit masyuuuk.

aku dgr dia ckp sesuatu kpd suamiku sambil meminta diri.
"so, do i see you tomorrow morning?" kata suamiku
"no, i will be coming again in 15 minutes." katanya. sah. mesti masalah slang scottish lagi. aku tergelak apabila suamiku menceritakannya. plumber tersebut hanya mahu turun sekejap dan dtg semula nanti.
tidak lama kemudian dia naik dan menyatakan masalah tersebut tidak dpt diselesaikan pd malam tersebut kerana memerlukan mesin.

"o, then i will sleep in the kitchen tonight" kata suamiku. agaknya plumber tu kesian mendengarnya, dan tidak lama kemudian datang lagi seorang plumber berjambang membawa mesin yang agak besar. nampaknaya mereka tidak mahu mengalah pada malam itu. plumber itu membuka ruang rahsia yang menyorokkan paip utama di stor rumahku. ooh di situ rupanya kedudukan paip tersebut. plumber tersbut memasukkan wayar di dalammnya dan imej kelihatan pada skrin mesin perjalanan wayar tersebut. mesin tersebut telah mengesan bongkah hitam gris dan kotaran lain yang menjadi punca sumbat. memang tidak lari jauh dari imaginasiku.

'ok, i have informed residence upstairs not to use the sink until tomorrow morning." katanya. suamiku menyatakan bahawa dia juga telah mengetuk pintu penghuni atas tetapi hanya satu sahaja yang berjawab.
"don't worry, i gave them a good bang." katanya. ah, leganya. aku sudah terbayangkan katil dan tidur yang aman.
"that should do the trick for tonight, but please if there is any emergency, just call me at any hour." baik sungguh. plumber berjambang tu kata kepada suamiku, kalau mereka tidak dipanggil sudah tentu kami akan tidur di dapur dan masalah ini tidak akan selesai. lagi pula, paip ini memang belum pernah diservis dan kotoran sebegitu mengambil masa bertahun-tahun utk terbentuk. mereka berjanji akan datang sebelum pukul 9 pada esok hari. sebelum pulang suamiku menawarkan minuman.
"please, i would like to offer you a drink." plumber yang baru sahaja hendak pulang, terberhenti untuk memuliakan tawaran tersebut. suamiku mengeluarkan dua juice anggur bekalan zulfa harian ke sekolah dan menawarkannya. mereka kelihatan seperti tidak menyangkanya dan berkata..
"oh we don't drink that, thank you." hahaha...aku rasa mesti dia ingat suami aku nak offer dia minum arak..huhuh, sekali rupanya jus kanak-kanak..apa raaaa..
mereka pulang pada pukul 12mlm, dan sejurus itu kami melelapkan mata. alhamdulillah.

8.30am
alhamdulillah kerana diberikan tidur yang mencukupi.
tiga orang plumber dtg pd pagi tersebut. mereka membawa alatan yang tidak pernah aku lihat. tiba-tiba rumahku seperti di crime scene. walkie talkie sahut menyahut. perbincangan berlaku dgn loghat scottish pekat. aku tidak dapat mencuri-curi dengar kerana sebahagian besar masaku dibilik dan ruang begitu sempit utk aku mundar mandir. tidak lama kemudian satu lagi mesin dibawa. mesin utk memecahkan clog. mereka tidak dpt melakukannya dari bawah, lalu meminta izin utk mukar operasi dari ruma kami. keadaan tidak ubah seperti di crime scene. (dah kali kedua ke aku sebut?). aku terdengar bunyi rodokan mesin. suamiku kata mereka merodok dari atas dan bawah. ada beberapa orang di bawah yang membuat kerja tersebut. akhirnya air hitam pekat keluar dari sinki. ya, itulah cebisan dan lebihan bongkah gris yang berjaya dikeluarkan. aku terdengar air pili sinki dibuka dengan kuat..alhamdulillah! air dihisap masuk dengan laju..alhamdulillah.
suamiku mengucapkan berbanyak terima kasih.
"that would do for many years.." katanya sebelum beredar..alamak perli ke? eheheh..takpelah perli pun takpe..terima kasih banyak-banyak tak terhingga. aku rasa krisis sinki aku dah jadi krisis paip utama taymills, mereka melayan kami seperti mangsa kerana lebihan air melimpah ke flat kami yg berada paling hampir dgn paip utama. alhamdulillah.

tetapi adakah aku akan menerima surat susulan?
pasti ada surat warning, paling tidak kepada semua residents...tunggu....

tak sangka aku sangkut di statement problem begitu lama

2010-10-29T16:26:00.000-07:00

dah lama dah ni..
putar-putar..
ayat tu kejap jadi satu perenggan
lepas tu pindah ke tempat lain
lepas tu jadi satu ayat
last-last jadi footnote sahaja
batuk pun belum habis
batuk kong kong
esok birthday cik abang
nak buat apa
mcm tak dpt nak surprise je
beli sesama la...

layan kes udang/penyu dan tekstil

2010-10-26T12:50:00.000-07:00

Lemah betul badan hari ni, rasa mcm demam suspected denggi masa di Malaysia dulu - lemah sendi, terhuyung hayang...dah makan ubat dah, harapnya esok baik. Esok nak pergi PhD seminar pulak. Tadi alhamdulillah gagahkan diri pergi kelas jugak (international trade), yelah dah penat bersengkang mata melayan kes US-Shrimp (Malaysia yg bawak kes) dan Turkey-Textile, takkanla tak gi kelas pulak..lagipun segan kat lecturer, mesti dia perasan aku takde..dahla test hari tu dpt sikit..mana taknya, budak2 yg audit kelas kena kongsi kertas soalan, camner nak jawab, aku nak bulatkan A kawan aku nak bulat B, camne nak bincang dlm test camtu, dahla dia lelaki, mmg tak selesa..akhirnya aku mintak kwn aku tu cabut kertas soalan tu biar aku buat dari belakang..tajuk belakang mmg aku tk smpt cover..hahah padan muka..tapi takpe, excercise je tu.camna pun tebal gakla muka ms dpt result tu..joint effort konon..hehe

Muadz jadi Dr. Muadz, suapkan aku ubat, pakaikan selimut..perasan betul.hehe.dia kata 'mama panggil Dr. Muadz la..'. Semalam dia recall nama2 sepupu2 dia..'najya girl, yg satu lagi, nijad boy, amir boy, najwa girl'... Zulfa gelak bila mama cerita andak kalau tidur gesel kaki kat mama sampai mcm nak keluar api..hehe..sebab zulfa suka pgg siku, muadz masih cari telinga orang kalau nak tidur.

Hmm..payah rasanya membuat draft kali ni. Supervisor kata ' I know you are working hard on your draft'..terima kasih kerana memahami. Maklumlah, setiap ayat yang aku tulis adalah liabiliti bagi aku, dan aku juga mesti dapat membayangkan muka examiners nanti bila baca...berhati perutla sikit, kenalah pastikan ayat2 tu masuk akal dan sedap je. kalau diorang fed up baca, tak ke aku jugak yg susah. Aku harap dpt siapkan by minggu ni, minggu depan dah nak hntr kat supervisor.

Tadi aku angkut (shopping) buku dari library..best betul, buku2 yg edisi lama library dah tak nak, so aku beli la 2 pound, 1.50 pound...okla tu, buku2 EU law, International criminal law..dlm ebay harganya masih 20-30 pound walaupun edisi lama.

Nota kaki: kes US-Shrimp - Malaysia bawak kes ke WTO sbb US telah mendiskriminasi pengekspot udang - mengenakan syarat bhw udang hendaklah ditangkap tanpa menganiaya / mengancam penyu dgn menggunakan teknologi TED US atau seumpamanya, yg mmbawa kpd embargo import udang kpd negara2 yg tidak mmpunyai teknologi tu. Disebalik papan tanda menjaga alam sekitar dan habitat haiwan yg pupus, embargo ini juga boleh melindung industri udang US dari udang import. Negara-negara lain yg bersama Malaysia sbg third parties ialah Thailand, India dan beberapa negara lain.

Pagi yang dingin

2010-10-23T20:42:00.000-07:00

Memandangkan malam sudah semakin makin panjang maka saya mesti membiasakan diri menggandakan waktu belajar saya pada waktu malam. Walaupun jari jemari saya sejuk menekan punat huruf komputer, tapi saya amat bersyukur berupaya duduk dengan selesa di meja belajar dan bukannya merengkok kesejukan di dalam selimut tebal. Dan bilik kedua saya telah saya ubahsuai sepenuhnya menjadi tempat saya belajar, sebagai persediaan menghadapi musim sejuk. Pada musim sejuk saya mungkin tidak dapat berlama di pejabat kerana sebahagian besar waktu saya dihabiskan di dalam kelas yang saya sertai di tambah dengan waktu solat yang rapat, lebih sesuai untuk saya lakukan di rumah.

Tanggungjawab saya yang sememangnya berat ini semakin memperlihatkan cabarannya dengan peredaran masa. Saya amat berterimakasih kepada suami saya yang telah memberi laluan kepada saya untuk melanjutkan pengajian saya terlebih dahulu. InsyaAllah masanya akan tiba untuk saya mengembalikan khidmat saya kepadanya. Allah lebih mengetahui rencananya.

The Burns 2010

2010-10-20T03:36:00.000-07:00

Program The Burns adalah program tahunan centre kami. Selain bertujuan 'retreat', ia juga membina semangat persaudaraan dan memberi panduan bagi penulisan PhD. Diantara slot yang menarik ialah 'independant and demonstrating analytical thinking', 'time factor in completing a thesis', óriginality in research'and 'managing relationship with the supervisor as a mature student'. Selain itu para peserta diberi peluang menyertai balloon-debate mengenai ancaman paling besar terhadap keamanan dunia. Kami juga dapat melihat mock-viva oleh salah seorang pelajar PhD yang akan bergraduat.

Program ini diadakan di The Burns, sebuah rumah dan tanah persendirian seluas 190 ekar yang dimiliki oleh keluarga Russels yang diserahkan sebagai trust untuk program-program belia bagi mengenang kematian anaknya James Russel di dalam perang dunia kedua ketika umurnya 21 tahun.

Bangunan The Burns - mempunyai 18 bilik tidur, sebuah drawing room, sebuah perpustakaan, sebuah bilik makan. Makanan disediakan oleh tukang masak khas. Saya telah memesan makanan 'vegetarian' untuk memudahkan urusan penyediaan makanan.

Ini ialah kentang lecek dengan tauhu (daging vegetarian) dan brokoli.

Ini pula ialah nasi susu manis dengan limau mandarin.

InsyaAllah

2010-10-06T10:39:00.000-07:00

Sakit belakang aku bawa laptop ke ofis. Laptop hitam universiti yang sekilo lebih. Laptop tu best sebab ada skrin besar tapi bila bab mengangkut, berat sangat. Jadi aku terpaksa buat pilihan, tinggal jelah kat ofis. Balik rumah je terus buat pengumuman kpd muadz dan zulfa yg mama akan menggunakan laptop hijau mama bila mama di rumah.Laptop hijau tu aku guna utk edit gbr dan seumpamanya. Pandai-pandai pulak buat harta. Muadz kata: "tak boleh, ini laptop zulfa dan muadz"...

Sekarang waktu solat dah semakin rapat, jadi aku kena adjust timing ke ofis. Tadi aku balik ke rumah in between (pukul 1-2.20) dan terus makan mushroom soup yg bapak buat pagi tu dengan roti bawang putih a.k.a garlic bread. Aku kata kpd zulfa: "Sedapnya sup ni , pandai bapak buat, mama lapar, baru balik sekolah." Zulfa kata: "Kenapa mama tak makan di sekolah? Mama main P.E ke?" ler..budak zulfa ingat aku ada aktiviti gym (physical excercise) mcm dia ke smpai tak smpt makan...hehe

Aku ingat lgi kelas P.E waktu kecil2 dulu..samar-samar...
Ada dewan besar..lantai kayu...besi-besi pada dinding...bangku akrobatik..gym mat..dan aku change baju gym...alamak dah ada asap dan kabus....dah tak ingat dah...

Tadi ada meeting dgn PhD Director (Thesis Monitoring Meeting), kena berikrar utk progress enam bulan kehadapan..tadi dpn dia aku tak kata insyaAllah (asyik tersasul je nak sebut..sebut dlm hati je...nmpk sgt byk janji yg ditabur). Sekarang bolehlah sebut insyaAllah dgn kuatnya...sandarkan semuanya kepada Allah setelah berusaha.

mushroom soup yg bapak buat dari cendawan original - hence the grey colour

choosing assignment topic = choosing wife?

2010-10-05T13:47:00.000-07:00

I like auditting classes because it makes me feel like 'I don't have enough time'. Then I will have to speed up things.

This subject I'm taking is going to be another International Arbitration Practice class, as there is a flood of reading materials which is already imposed from day one! It was kind of 'hey you are not threatened enough already? I just need a few students in this class'..hihi..but there was indeed not many students as compared to other classes I joined.

I remember the days doing my degree. The kulliyyah did not exhibit the names of the lecturers fearing of 'lecturer shopping'practice. The most favoured ones will have many classes and students while the least favoured are left with a few bunch of students - the better to be attacked!

One thing that I like said by the lecturer today was: "Me, choosing your assignment topic is just like your parents choosing your wife".. yeah, it kinda make sense.

Time is passing fast. I really have to finalise things up, well at least for this stage. Important things ahead are my presentations and upgrading process. Its peek-a-boo with time. No excuse of the weather or anything (should be). "Ready or not? Here I come!"

After class I spent my time baking with the kids. They are on holiday for two weeks and we have no plan as at yet to bring them anywhere. Its windy and rather cold. We tried the 'Ginger Mint Blueberry Miniature Cake' by Ruth Clemens, second runner up of The Great British Bake Off Finals. The taste was ok, but I need to use proper steel bakeware for better outcome.

Kena beli bekas muffin

Autumn 2010

2010-10-04T11:33:00.000-07:00

Baru tahu bagaimana rasanya apabila Dundee mulai sejuk.Rupanya musim panas di sini sekejap sahaja. Patutlah kawan-kawan di sini berjalan sakan pada musim panas dan bunga kerana dijangka akan terperap dirumah pada musim-musim yang lain. Walaubagaimanapun, Alhamdulillah, kami tidak menghadapi masalah 'catuan heater' kerana bayaran asrama sudah termasuk gas pemanas rumah. Gas pemanas rumah akan dipasang dan dihentikan secara automatik mengikut suhu semasa. Bagi mereka yang menyewa sendiri, bil utk gas pemanas rumah adalah agak tinggi, sebab itulah penjimatan perlu dilakukan. Walaubagaimanapun, terdapat juga kelebihan-kelebihan lain menyewa di sendiri seperti kos sewa yang lebih rendah, dan lokasi serta design rumah yang mengikut citarasa sendiri.

Berdebar juga menanti musim sejuk.

Bagaimana pula kaitan diantara musim dengan pengajian? Sekarang ini siang sudah menjadi semakin pendek. Cuaca pula asyik mendung dan hujan. Payung / baju hujan mesti dibawa kemana-mana. Ada yang kata mood study mungkin terjejas. Jadi kalau nak pulun study, pulun betul-betul sebelum masuk musim sejuk sebab ramai yang murung/ demam/ batuk etc. Nauzubillah min zalik.

Kelas sudah pun bermula utk sesi baru. Ramai betul students dlm kelas tadi. Mujur aku teringat bawa bekal air, kismis dan mint..pergh mengantuk jugak kelas tiga jam (break 15 minit). Member sebelah org Ghana aku rasa dia ngantuk, tapi aku biar jelah dia ngantuk..hehe..ini kes saja buat dengki. Kelas Downstream Policies. Banyak betul istilah-istilah baru engineering dan ekonomi yang baru didengar, ditambah lagi dgn slang scottish pensyarah tersebut. Lawakk jugak bila dia buat lawak org tak gelak..err...dia kata 'it was supposed to be a joke'..har har.

Aku perhatikan pensyarah tu dari awal dia masuk ke kelas..aku teringat time aku ngajar. sudah tentu students juga memerhatikan aku..very typical style semua pensyarah buat..masuk kelas, adjust nota, adjust board, power point, check pencahayaan..cuma pensyarah tadi makan choclate bar 2 batang (itu aku tak buat), dan dia mulakan kelas duduk atas meja (hehe, kdg2 buat jugak camtu), lepas tu ayat-ayat yg mmbuatkan students gerun seperti ' in order to survive this class...' dan ayat-ayat yg konon nampak baiklah seperti 'i dont expect you to know everything, but i do want you to show some intellect in ...'..whatever pun, sama je.hhehe.

Esok macam manala pulak. kelas International Trade.

tingkap rumah taymills yang berembun pd waktu malam.

Kek Idola

2010-08-29T11:08:00.000-07:00

Kek ini adalah antara kek lapis yang sedap dan tidak melibatkan pewarna. Risau jugak bila buat kek lapis yg berwarna, kita sebenarnya tak berapa perhatikan had warna yang dibenarkan.Kalau letak pewarna sikit, tak cantik pulak.

Ok, kek ini telah dicuba di Dundee, menggunakan resepi ini, but of course with a little bit of modification.

KEK LAPIS IDOLA

Bahan;
10 biji telur
16 oz mentega
200 gm horlick
50 gm serbuk santan
80 gm kaya
400 gm coklat masak ( dicairkan )
1 tin susu manis
1/2 gelas milo
1 1/2 gelas gula halus (kurangkan kalau tak nak manis)
2 gelas tepung gandum
1 sudu teh esen vanila
sedikit browning dan warna kuning

Cara;
Pukul mentega dan gula hingga putih dan gebu
Masukkan telur satu persatu. Pukul sampai kembang
Masukkan horlick, kaya, serbuk santan, susu manis, tepung gandum dan esen vanila. Gaul rata.
Bahagia adunan kepada 2 bahagian.
Bahagian pertama diberi warna kuning. Adunan ini dibahagi 2 bahagian ( untuk lapisan bawah dan atas ).
Bahagian kedua, campurkan milo, browning sugar dan coklat masak tadi.
Bakar adunan kuning berlapis-lapis. Lepas itu bakar adunan coklat juga berlapis-lapis. Akhir sekali, adunan kuning lagi, bakar berlapis-lapis.

Pengalaman Berpuasa di Dundee

2010-08-15T03:54:00.000-07:00

Pengalaman berpuasa di Dundee adalah sangat menarik. Maha besar Allah, beribadat di sini sgt mendekatkan kita dengan kebesaran Allah swt dalam mencipta bumi ini. Waktu solat dan berpuasa berbeza begitu ketara sekali mengikut musim. Kali ini kami berpeluang berpuasa pada musim panas. Jumlah jam berpuasa di sini adalah lebih kurang 20 jam. Maknanya, hanya tinggal 4 jam sahaja untuk berbuka, tarawikh dan sahur. Semalam contohnya, waktu imsak adalah pada pukul 2.09 pagi dan maghrib pada pukul 9.00 mlm. Lebih kurang 5 jam extra berbanding berpuasa di Malaysia. Alhamdulillah ala kulli hal. Tapi Allah juga maha adil dan kaya, sungguhpun musim sekarang adalah summer, panasnya tidaklah seterik jika berada di Malaysia. Cuacanya Alhamdulillah, sejuk dan sentiasa hujan, terutamanya pada hari-hari awal berpuasa.
Perbezaan tempoh masa berpuasa membuatkan aku mengimbas semula ilmu geografi yang tak seberapa tentang pergerakan bumi mengelilingi matahari. Aku juga semak kejadian ini melalui internet.

Bumi kita seperti yang kita tahu berpusing mengelilingi matahari (365.25). Bumi juga berpusing pada paksinya (24 jam). Paksi tersebut adalah sedikit condong sebanyak 23.5 degree. UK mengalami musim panas apabila bumi condong kearah matahari dan siangnya menjadi lebih panjang kerana kedudukan UK yang sangat hampir di utara. Pada musim sejuk pula siangnya akan menjadi sangat singkat kerana kedudukan UK yang berada jauh dari equator. Di Shetland Island UK, tempoh siang boleh mencapai sehingga 23 jam dan di utara Norway yang dikenali sebagai ‘the land of the midnight sun’, 24 jam.

Jadi kita boleh bayangkanlah bagaimana waktu solat boleh berubah dengan begitu ketara. Dikatakan di sini, waktu isyak tidak dapat ditentukan dengan tepat kerana matahari tidak hilang sepenuhnya pada musim summer. Jadi kami solat isyak sebaik sahaja selesai solat maghrib. Kalau kita tengok ke langit pada waktu itu, kita akan dapati bahawa malam di sini tidaklah segelap Malaysia.

Saya pasti teruja melihat perubahan waktu solat pada musim sejuk nanti. InsyaAllah.

Gantung Kuali

2010-08-14T06:40:00.000-07:00

Baru ingat nak gantung kuali bulan ramadhan ni, tapi tadi pergi Mathews (kedai menjual makanan oriental)terjumpa pulak kepala ikan kod dan salmon 50p dan 70p sahaja. Kalau convert RM dalam lebih kurang RM3, murah tu. Buat kari kepala ikan atau masak lemak cili api mesti sedap.Ehm,simpanlah dulu dlm peti, sebab malam ni nak berbuka puasa di masjid.InsyaAllah.

Kepala ikan di sini murah sebab orang putih memang tak makan benda ni. Dulu, kepala ikan ni memang tidak ada harga dan dibuang begitu sahaja, tapi apabila mereka dapat tahu kepala ikan dimakan oleh orang asia, mereka mula menjualnya.

Antara barang yang aku angkut dari mathews ialah tepung beras, tepung pulut, beras pulut, santan, lengkuas dan serai. Stok ramadhan dan raya kot.

Setakat ni, barang masakan yg biasa digunakan di Malaysia boleh didapati di kedai mathews tu, sebab kita share bahan masakan/makanan yang sama dengan orang Thailand. Ada banyak produk Thailand di situ. Aku selalu tanya kawan Thai aku kalau ada barang-barang yang aku tak jumpa. Dia yang cdgkan, contohnya kalau nak dapatkan udang yg besar,murah dan belum dimasak, aku patut pergi ke Freshfarm.Memang sedap, tapi udang tu dah dikupas dan tiada kepala serta ekor.

Barang yang masih belum dijumpai disini ialah daun kesum, bunga kantan, sayur keladi, daun pisang..atau aku yang masih belum explore lagi.

Buku sudah sampai

2010-08-12T01:50:00.000-07:00

The books have arrived at my doorstep.Duit biasiswa memang patut diperuntukkan sebahagiannya untuk membeli buku.Di sini buku lebih mudah dibeli. Buku-buku tersebut adalah buku-buku terpakai yang saya beli di Amazon.Harganya jauh lebih murah dan kualitinya masih baik. Menariknya disini, orang putih tidak menconteng buku-buku mereka malahan nama juga tidak dicatatkan. Sudah menjadi budaya mereka untuk memelihara barang-barang mereka agar kelihatan baru kerana barang-barang tersebut boleh disumbangkan kepada kedai-kedai kebajikann (charity shops) atau menjualnya di car boot, gumtree atau ebay.

Saya sedang mengumpul buku-buku di dalam bidang pengajian sedikit demi sedikit. Undang-undang percetakan di sini adalah ketat, sehingga tidak membenarkan percetakan/ photocopy dalam jumlah yang banyak. Kemudahan mesin fotostat juga terhad dan proses cetakannya amat lambat. Justeru disini adalah lebih economic jika buku-buku dibeli sahaja, biarpun diatas tangan.Kalau di Malaysia, sudah tentu buku-buku tersebut sudah selamat dihantar di kedai-kedai fotostet dgn bayaran yang murah dan hasil cetakan yang amat memuaskan hati.

Its teasing me now

2010-07-26T03:31:00.000-07:00

This is what I do if I can’t think of proper sentences to write, or the sentences I make are not ‘academic enough’ or too ‘layman type’…

In between my paragraphs I would write:

[create a para that describe the …… ,… and …. share the same common economic philosophy. That there is a strong nexus amongst them, and that they are worth to be studied together. Highlight that the convergence is needed and that each discipline would contribute to another.]

(instructing myself)

I am right now reading the same articles again and again, I just don’t know why it is too slow this time. I must get this hurdle passed before the end of the week!

Come on proper sentences, come to me now…

London Tour

2010-07-13T07:36:00.000-07:00

Our first trip to the south was to meet my father at Manchester during his few days stay there. This was our second trip, basically to get to know London and a few major cities. This time, our route was through Durham. We didn't stop to take pictures. It was breathtaking, Subhanallah...just like the Terengganu road along the coastline. I was able to snap a few, to remind me how it looked like.

We stopped at Durham for lunch at Chester-le-street Riverside. A brief one, just to regain energy. The kids wanted so much to play at the playground, they did'nt have time to.

This is a glimpse of a castle which caught our attention from our picnic spot.

We were supposed to park our car at Hillingdon Station but Garmin lost its signal in the middle of the highway. We convoyed and gathered at Uxbridge before moving on manually to Hillingdon Station.

The first must-must place that a person visiting London should go is the Buckingham Palace. We were able to watch the dispersing procession, if not a little bit, far away glimpse of the changing of guards procession.

Eye of London..

An old building on the way to Trafalgar Square:

The Trafalgar Square:

Typical London. But next time I may consider to have a ride on this tour bus..

Hyde Park and Royal Albert Hall.

KFC from my kitchen

2010-05-26T12:49:00.000-07:00

When my kids asked for KFC, I had to tell him them that there is no halal KFC around. I then gave it a try to order fried chicken from a halal restaurant, but it was quite expensive and the taste was not that good. That gave me the urge to make them myself...and guess what, its far cheaper (GBP2-3 for one whole chicken as compared to GBP9 for 8-9 pieces from the restaurant)and of course, yummy tummy chicken lickin'good! It only took me the effort of surfing the recipe and patience in marinating and frying....on the KFC thing, its very rewarding to see the kids eat.

marinated chicken

ingredients

in a plastic, to shake

with flour

mashed potato

ready, as you call it

with coleslaw, curry rice and mashed potato

I have to start somewhere…

2010-05-24T06:43:00.001-07:00

Different to what almost everybody thinks, if you are doing a PhD, you must have a solid background on your research area before you even embark in the programme. Well I think I am the opposite. I have travelled in quite a number of research areas / areas of interest before I end up abruptly in International Investment Law as my area of concentration. And before I realize it, I have to catch up quick, very quick.

I see masters students here have undergone their investment law classes, and thus it is quite weird introducing yourself during the first two months after enrolment that ‘ I am doing my PhD, in investment law’, when you have almost no basic on it. And so, I started to audit classes. I have audited Investment Arbitration Practice, which is meant to be an advanced class. My supervisor said that it doesn’t matter if you have not audited the prerequisites, because you are a PhD student. On that juncture I knew that I have to work extremely hard so as not to seem so apparent to be ‘one who is very new in the area’.

This is the picture of my classmates.

My Singapore friend gave me a remark, ‘well, you have to start somewhere’..

It appeared that the whole class was actually a mooting activity, organized systematically by the instructor. The instructor was a prominent figure ( I have googled his name, and it appeared on top of the list), an American lawyer from an international law firm who has represented in many arbitration cases and has also the experience as an arbitrator in many investment tribunals. When I say many, I really mean ‘many’ cases….he seemed to have a role in almost all of the cases. Just imagine how lucky we were in his classes, as we suddenly believe that the long, winding ICSID cases we read seemed very close and real with all the spices of details from the instructor.

We got our group, we did our memorial (or rather, skeleton of arguments), submitted it and got ready for our presentation the next day. The whole thing seemed smooth, maybe because of the way the instructor conducted the course, we practically were able to present our arguments well, using the key cases correctly ( at least not in haywire). I compared this to the days my students were preparing their memorials for international mooting competitions, they had all the difficulties to understand the moot problem, researching the materials etc and always led to tears of emotions and conflicts.

These are the cases that we started with in the one week course:

Azinian v. Mexico
AMT v. Zaire
CMS v. Argentina
CMS v. Argentina (Merits)
CMS v. Argentina (Annulment)
Enron v. Argentina
Inceysa v. El Salvador
Loewen v. United States
Metalclad v. Mexico
MHS v. Malaysia
MHS v. Malaysia Annulment
Mitchell v. Congo (Annulment)
Parkerings v. Lithuania
Romak v. Uzbekistan
Salini v. Morocco
SD Myers v. Canada
Tokios Tekeles v. Ukraine
Tokios Tekeles v. Ukraine (dissent)
Wena v. Egypt

One quite interesting part was that the Malaysian Memorial for MHS v Malaysia, was prepared quite well. The instructor said that it was quite a good example for a country like Malaysia which has no experience in ICSID, could prepare like that. (Well, the main reason the Malaysian memorial was taken as an example was because the parties – Malaysia-UK had consented that all the statements/ documents issued are transparent and would become public domain, unlike other disputes) . And of course, there are other memorials which were better, except that they are not available on-line. From my quick glance of reading, I have came across a few other Malaysian cases like Gruslin.

The MHS v Malaysia Annulment was controversial as well. Especially on the point ‘ whether the investment contributed to the economic development of Malaysia’…

The course was fun.

PhD Expectations

2010-05-23T16:05:00.000-07:00

I consider myself in these first one and a half month as in the exploratory stage of PhD. I was lucky to be able to participate in the Easter Seminar where there were talks on Research and Methodology in Law, Generic Skills for PhD Students, Critical Thinking and The Challenges of Doing a PhD Thesis.

The main thing in PhD of which I understand, is to find gaps in the existing knowledge, potential issues/ problems and then contribute in the area. It is all then stem to whether or not you will succeed in the viva. In viva, a PhD student is supposed to potray:
i- adequate knowledge in the field
ii- significant contribution to the knowledge
iii-evidence of originality
iv- publishable material
v- presented in an acceptable academic style

My centre adds the sixth criteria:
vi- practical impact (to the niche interest of the centre- oil and gas/ energy / policy/ international investment and the like)

And woops, another one:
vii- to EXCEL! Stand out / be different from others.

That's quite an expectation I suppose...
So as they always say, the first six months is very crucial to identify the gaps/potential area of study from the literature reviews done. As in my case, I have to succeed the upgrading process before I am actually allowed to continue as a PhD student.

Among the things I took from the talks were phrases like:
1. Remember, the clock ticks!! (brr...that's scary)
2. Don't mess about! (as the clock ticks of course)
3. You should'nt have time to do other things!(in this context, the presenter referred to publishing/presenting papers...he said, publications can wait, but PhD can't...but there were other views on this by other presenters)
4. Don't be Mr. Deaf or Mr. Slow! (showing no progress)
5. Don't waffle! ( especially when people ask you 'whats your topic?' and you go like 'er..er...bla..bla..', it should be clear, short and precise)
6. Write and throw away!(the more you write, you don't mind of throwing them away if people criticise your work for betterment, but if you write too slow, you'll get heart attack when somebody suddenly say that your work/ approach is inaccurate, because your work becomes too sacred for you. In PhD, get ready to throw your writings away, that's normal)
7. Don't apply the magician approach! (in selecting your topic, it must be from literature reviews, not suddenly from your head like magic)

And then came the group activities on legal methodology terms like empirical, deductive, inductive, normative, positivist..bla..bla..

The conclusion was somewhat powerful: THE WORST STAKEHOLDER AFFECTED IF YOU FAIL YOUR PHD IS NO ONE BUT YOU...
and I understand that fully.

And during the two days seminar...I slept very early at night, without fail.

Study has begun

2010-05-15T14:13:00.000-07:00

There are so many things to tell, but i will do it slowly as time permits.

I'm busy now reading investment cases for our investment arbitration practice classes next week. I am very fortunate here that there are many interesting classes that I can audit,those expensive ones if you are not from the centre. I have already took a course on contracts in oil and gas. It is worth of USD 2+++ outside. I have to however be careful that the classes dont take too much of my time. I need time for my studies, but as my supervisor says, its good to get exposure from the classes on the terms / concepts/ concerns that may be useful in my topic area. This course, in particular (investment arbitration) is indeed the first in my sv's list.

No wonder my sv says that it is interesting..its mooting!! No wonder he says that I will be benefitting a lot from it...I am practically reading / have to read eight arbitral awards, BITs, 3-4 regulations in just 3 days!! And on the first day, we were reminded that whether or not we are registered or audit students, participation comes first!

As I could envisage, in moot activities, reading alone is not enough. Reading must be in the view of presenting it. And presenting it must be co-related to the moot problem, the treaties, rules and other relevant cases. This definitely remind me of my students in their mooting trainings. I'm in it now guys! Wish me luck!

Wookay, got to continue reading!

Mengutip gambar

2009-12-31T22:19:00.000-08:00

Apabila merekod semula apa yang telah saya lalui sepanjang berkhidmat (apabila mengisi LNPT), saya dapati banyak peristiwa yang tidak sempat saya rakamkan. I started searching for pictures from the university website. I found a few, well enough for my album. Cuma terasa juga terkilan apabila gambar-gambar mengacara majlis tidak ditemui. Gambar pengacara-pengacara majlis untuk majlis lain juga jarang ditemui.

Pictures do speak by itself. Semalam, saya bersembang dengan abah saya tentang pengalaman-pengalamannya. Satu hari nanti, jika diberi kekuatan, ingin saya menulis semua pengalamannya. Alangkah lebih mudah jika pengalaman-pengalaman tersebut dapat dirakamkan melalui gambar?

Ini adalah gambar sewaktu saya menyertai Bengkel Pelan Integriti Nasional oleh universiti saya.

Ini adalah pengalaman berharga saya. Audit Keserakanan. I just couldnt believe it that I actually took part in the process of defending the university in the audit. I was quite passive at first ( as the more you speak in audits, the more you make mistakes). But when it was my turn to present, I had to be seen confident enough. Oklah kot. Well, somebody had to do it.

Mesyuarat di buka oleh NC saya. Memang post NC adalah satu jawatan yang mencabar. I saw how confident he was explaining on the visions of the university...etc..everything seemed to just fall in its place.

Bergambar kenangan dengan auditors.

Ini pula adalah gambar di Port Dickson untuk pembentangan bajet 2010 dan 2011. It was quite awkward at the beggining to mingle with top leaders of the university. I had to get use to it. I am afterall helping these top leaders...sebenarnya setiap pensyarah itu sangat signifikan kepada universiti.

Ada juga gambar saya sedang berbaris di dalam perhimpunan bulanan universiti. Bagus.

Pemadam, apabila amat diperlukan.

2009-12-31T22:01:00.000-08:00

Jarang saya gunakan pemadam. Hanya untuk aktiviti-aktiviti tertentu apabila simulasi pengisian borang diperlukan. Saya menjangkakan minggu ini saya akan menggunakan pemadam lagi, utk isi borang-borang cuti belajar.

Lihat sahajalah pemadam saya ini dari brand new sampai tinggal sedikit.Dalam hanya setengah hari! Terpaksa saya panggilkan cleaner untuk vacum bilik saya selepas itu.

Pertandingan Mahkamah Mut Syariah PMMS2009

2009-12-20T02:13:00.000-08:00

It was a relief that we have just finished organizing the first ever Syariah Moot competition.We claim it the first done at the national level because it was funded by the Malaysian ministry of higher education, involved by most higher learning institutions offering law / syariah (offer was extended to all) and the fact that the moot problem was prepared by the Malaysian Syarie lawyer association or council(PGSM), at par with the Malaysian Bar Council for civil lawyers.

As it was the first of its kind, it was quite a pressure to explore and experiment its execution. To be on the safe side, we had to follow the established standard, rules and even the counting of marks to be the same of that of the Jessup Moot competition, well known among the legal faternity. If this was to be the first, and if it was us to organize it, we decided that we will definitely have to do it properly. Looking at the people around me, I feel confident that we will manage to do it, although that means there are a lot of preparations to be done. My friends constantly gave me the support I needed and was always there reminding me on the standards of Jessup or LawAsia. We dared not to change or create the rules, fearing of disputes that may rise.

It began when the PGSM agreed to draft the moot problem. I was so thankful to friends at PGSM for their willingness (old and new friends) , and of course ex-students at PGSM. They came up with the moot problem although at quite a short notice. As having an affiliation to USIM, we refused to look at the moot problem, what more to meddle with what was prepared. The moot problem was only made known to all teams when it was supposed to be made known.Considering syariah moot was new, we only gave some samples of Jessup and LawAsia moot problems to PGSM to come up with sort of the same standard.

And so the meetings began. (Woops, I have not done the last minutes yet).
The venues, the budget,the teams, the exchanging of memorials, the judges.
Here, my friends took their parts efficiently - arrangement of the judges, rules and countings, management of the teams...etc.

The syariah moot was also promoted through Nasi Lemak Kopi O one saturday morning. It was the first experience for me. Our students- Hameezah, Hazimin and Azim also made their first tv appearance by their moot simulation. Well done!

This is an example in the moot court.

The judges were real ones from syariah courts and syarie lawyers in Malaysia.

Judges were ushered to the moot courts.

This is the counting room where team representatives make decisions on penalties and audit the process of keying in the marks. In picture were representatives from UIA,UM,UUM and USIM.Others went for a rest.

Judges in the briefing room before each session. (oops, what was i doing at the back?)

In mootings, the mooters are trained to 'submit' to the judges, with full honour and respect, assisting the court to come to a decision. As compared to debates, the debaters debates with the opponent.Sebab itulah kadang-kadang kita lihat gaya dan bahasa debat sedikit agresif kerana gaya dan bahasa yang agresif boleh mengurangkan motivasi pihak lawan. Di dalam mahkamah, mooters perlu beradab sopan dan menggunakan bahasa yang sopan dan tepat kepada hujah-hujah perundangan. The role of the mooters is to ask from the court the best relief their client deserve. Mooters are supposed to bring submissions based on questions of law.

Well, there are many more to tell on mooting.
I find it the best activity for a law student.
Harap mooting dapat berjangkit kpd semua student di FSU!

ISCOM is just around the corner!

2008-11-07T20:55:00.000-08:00

Well..this has been a one whole year job.
And next week, we are expecting fellow presenters from all over the world. I hope that the faculty could give them the best hospitality. ohhh..too busy to even update the blog. gtg....

Khairil Hisyam dan Ibadah Camp

2008-09-25T11:43:00.000-07:00

Satu sumbangan besar yang dibuat oleh arwah semasa hidupnya ialah 'Ibadah Camp' di IIC. Aku masih teringat ketika aku dipanggil oleh arwah untuk membincangkan beberapa perkara perundangan.Ofisnya tidaklah besar mana. Aku lihat terdapat beberapa rim kertas tersusun di penjuru biliknya. Gee begitu sibuk mengalihkan beberapa dokumen dari atas meja arwah.
"Yang ini ke, En. Khairil?" Tanya Gee. Gee lah staf yang paling memahami arwah.
"Ya." kata arwah. Gee beredar ke luar ofis menuju ke mejanya. Dia tekun mengerjakan apa yang disuruh bosnya itu.Arwah ialah manager ACAD (academic) di IIC pada ketika itu.
"Students akan grad tidak lama lagi." kata arwah. Aku mengangguk. Aku sebenarnya belum begitu faham struktur pengajian pelajar ketika itu.
"CMIS nanti akan handle ibadah camp." katanya lagi.
"Ibadah camp?" tanyaku
"Oh, head of CMIS belum beritahu lagi?" Tanyanya.
"Ada rasanya." Kataku. Aku selalu sahaja tidak prihatin dengan sekeliling. Yang pasti selepas ini perkataan 'ibadah camp' akan terpahat dalam ingatan.
"Besar tanggungjawab ini."katanya lagi.
Aku mengangguk cuba memahami bagaimana besar tanggungjawab yang dimaksudkan.
"Melihat kepada kepentingan ini kami masukkan sebagai kursus wajib bagi setiap pelajar yang hendak bergraduat."
"Dalam kem itu kita mesti terapkan semua fundamental islamic knowledge kalau-kalau masih ada pelajar kita yang belum menguasainya sebelum keluar IIC."
Aku mengangguk. Arwah benar-benar serius.
"Ia akan bertindak sebagai filtering sistem."Katanya penuh semangat.
"Del tengok pelajar kita macam mana? Ye lah dari segi penguasaan agama?" Tanyanya. Aku musykil juga kerana aku rasa manager akad di institusi lain mungkin tidak mempunyai penghayatan Islam sepertinya. Aku mula mengkaji karakternya. Satu sahaja perkataan yang aku ada untuknya iaitu 'mutamassik', sangat mutamassik biddin.
"Okay, tetapi ada banyak ruang yang perlu diperbaiki."
"Nanti head CMIS akan panggil semua buat modul."Nadanya mula perlahan.
"Saya mungkin tidak sempat nak jalankan ibadah camp ni dengan you guys." katanya.
"Kenapa?" tanyaku.
"Saya mungkin dipindahkan ke school." Katanya.

Belum sempat lama arwah ke IIS (school) (entah sempat entah tidak) arwah ke PTD.Setakat hari ini aku rasa sudah lebih atau hampir 10 kali Ibadah camp diadakan. Sepanjang aku dan suamiku berkhidmat di IIC tidak pernah sekali kami miss Ibadah camp. Dan benar kata arwah, memang di situlah kami memberikan panduan terakhir kepada para pelajar. Masih ramai yang mahukan bimbingan.Dan Ibadah camp akan kekal selagi ia berada di dalam struktur pengajian semua proigram di IIC. Dan selagi itulah arwah mendapat amal jariahnya insyaAllah.

Di IIC, sewaktu arwah masih memegang jawatan, staf tidak berani pakai yang menjolok mata kerana tahu arwah benar-benar implement rule tu di kolej. Pelajar apatah lagi.Lagu pun tak pasang kuat (kan Gee kan?hehe)..sudah samar juga kenangan itu dalam fikiranku.

Aku rasa memang arwah sudah dapat sebahagian besar yang dia inginkan dalam hidup..isteri yang baik..anak-anak (ingat lagi bila arwah kata 'you guys jangan laju sangat, nanti you guys dan ramai anak, I masih lagi bujang")..kerjaya yang baik..kawan-kawan yang baik (aku perhatikan yang arwah mempunyai ramai kenalan di timur tengah yang baik-baik)dan bahasa arab (aku rasalah, sebab nampak dia happy dapat berbahasa arab di libya).

Apabila kami bertanyakan tentang pilihannya ke PTD, dia nampaknya begitu tekad walaupun gajinya turun. Banyak juga rasanya. Dia menyatakan yang mungkin ini destinasinya. Familinya semua memintanya ke PTD. Ada sekali kami menumpangkannya ke ofis kerana nampak arwah menunggu bas ke ofis. Hairan juga kami, top manager macam tu pergi kerja naik bas awam. Arwah sangat humble orangnya. Apabila kami bertanyakan hal itu, dia senyum dan berkata ' entahlah.'Dia juga menyebutkan yang dia agak fobia kerana abangnya baru sahaja kemalangan kecil.

Itulah dia seorang Khairil Hisyam yang kami kenali.
Seorang yang berjiwa besar. Sungguh besar.

(Ambilan dari comment saya dalam perantau timur tengah:
Saya dan suami kawan arwah Hisyam dan Izad di IIC.
Arwah Hisyam memang seorang yang sangat baik dan dihormati. Sekiranya ada senarai kawan-kawan yang baik, sudah pasti nama arwah akan berada di dalam senarai nama-nama teratas. Sungguhpun tidak terdapat banyak ruang untuk kami bersama tetapi persahabatan itu amat terasa.
Kali terakhir kami berjumpa ialah pada waktu arwah pulang melihat anak kecilnya yang baru lahir. Langsung tidak tergambar pada ketika itu yang arwah akan pergi sebegitu cepat. Itulah hikmahnya Allah tidak membuka masa depan pada mata kita. Susuk tubuhnya seperti dahulu juga. Dia memeluk erat suamiku. Erat sekali. Kenapa dia begitu baik?Fikirku. "Mahiz,mahiz.." Katanya berulang kali. Aku dan izad tersenyum melihat dua rakan yang begitu lama tidak berjumpa. Izad menghidangkan air. Hairan juga melihat Izad ke sana kemari dalam waktu pantang. Terdetik di hati ini yang Izad bukanlah seorang yang lemah semangat tapi cekal dan berdikari.Kalau tidak masakan dapat tahan menemani arwah di Libya. Tidak semua isteri dapat lakukan itu. Dengan elektrik selalu terputus, panas, kemudahan yang sangat minimal. Tambah pula dengan jadual arwah yang sangat ketat. Arwah meninggal dunia memang di dalam berjihad. Dia seorang yang komited sepanjang pengetahuan kami. Kami membelek-belek passport tersebut. Arwah bertanya nama anak-anak kami. "Zulfa dan Muadz" kata kami. "Oh, kebetulan pula hampir sama dengan Muzaffar dan Muazzam" katanya pula. Mereka bercadang untuk ke Libya semula selepas Izad dah sihat sedikit agaknya. Arwah menghulurkan passport Muazzam yang baru sahaja dibuat. " Bukan senang nak dapat passport diplomat." katanya. "Muazzam kecil-kecil pun sudah dapat passport diplomat." Ujarnya lagi. Ibu Izad sedang mendukung Muazzam. Seorang yang sangat supportive.Muzaffar menyendeng-nyendeng dekat abahnya. Arwah berulang-ulang menyatakan 'sayang abah', 'I love you' dan memeluk2 anaknya. Bagi aku, kasih sayang yang ditunjukkan amat ketara. Kami belum pernah berjumpa dengannya selepas berumahtangga bersama keluarga. Sebelum pertemuan tersebut hanya pada hari perkahwinan dan konvo IIC. Jadi kami tidak terbayang keadaannya bersama orang yang disayangi erat sebegitu. Arwah juga tersebut 'sayang' pada isterinya. Terkantoi agaknya. Dia dan suamiku tersenyum. Manis sekali peristiwa tersebut jika dikenang pada waktu ini.
Sibuk sekali arwah menyuruh kami merasa kurma yang baru dibawa dari umrah. Aku sempat merasa satu kerana begitu sibuk melayan anakku makan. Arwah meminta Izad membungkuskan kurma untuk kami.Arwah juga bertanyakan dimana boleh dapat kek sarawak utk diberi kepada kawan-kawan di libya. Aku suggest beberapa tempat.Akhirnya aku menyatakan yang aku akan buat sendiri sekiranya ada masa dlm 1-2 hari tersebut sebelum arwah bertolak. Arwah gembira tetapi di dalam masa yang sama dia tidak mahu menyusahkan kami. Suamiku sebenarnya enggan berjanji kalau-kalau tidak dpt menunaikan permintaan itu. Entah kenapa kami terus membeli bahan untuk buat kek tersebut. Bukan satu tetapi tiga jenis sempat aku siapkan. Kami begitu gembira sekali. Kami hanya sempat mesej pada Izad dan menghantarkan kek tersebut ke rumah Izad. Pada waktu itu mereka menghabiskan masa menziarah keluarga arwah di putrajaya. Kami terasa sangat berpuas hati dapat menghantar bingkisan tersebut. Teringat lagi sewaktu suamiku datang untuk temuduga di IIC, arwah yg merupakan panel interview beredar dari bilik tersebut. Dia tidak mahu biase atau ada conflict of interest. Dia memang mengenali suamiku sewaktu di UIA.Sungguh mulia peribadinya. Teringat juga sewaktu aku mengkhabarkan siapa bakal suamiku, dia berkata " You beruntung, Del." Teringat lagi apabila arwah mengkhabarkan kepada kami yang keputusan arwah untuk memilih Izad sebagai isteri di Burger King.Kami mengucapkan tahniah kerana arwah sudah bersedia menamatkan zaman bujangnya. Teringat juga intention awalku untuk mengintai-intai peluang belajar di Malta. Aku mencarai-cari embassy Malaysia di Malta. Bagaimana aku begitu terkejut yang kedutaan Libya juga merangkumi Malta dan orang yang akan berurusan adalah arwah. Orang pertama yang paling gembira ialah suamiku.

Suamiku amat terkesan dengan pemergian arwah. Sesekali aku melihat dia termenung. Ada sekali tiba-tiba aku terdengar esakan yang tidak dapat ditahan ketika dia memandu kereta. Begitu dekat terasa arwah di dalam hati.

Aku baru menyambut ulang tahun pada 17 September, tidak pula aku sangka keesokannya aku bakal mendengar berita kematian. Sama terkejut rasanya apabila menerima berita kematian adik perempuanku dua tahun lepas yang meninggalkan suami dan anak kerana nahas jalanraya.

Semua sudah tercatat di dalam luh mahfuz. Kita merancang, Allah yang menentukan. Arwah mungkin mempunyai banyak perancangan dengan Izad dan anak2, tapi percayalah inilah pengakhiran yang paling baik kerana Allah yang menentukannya. Impian kita mungkin indah tapi Allah hanya berikan apa yang kita perlu, bukan apa yang kita ingini. Izad, you are strong...you will discover it inside you.

Secebis kenangan,
Kawan-kawanmu Arwah dan Izad,
Mahiz dan Fadhilah
Bangi

Ini pula balasan emel arwah kepada kami (how helpful he was):
Assalamu'alaikum w.b.t.

My dearest friends Del & Mahiz,

Tak sangka betul dgr berita dari u guys. Sblm ni, saya ada dpt e-mel org tanya psl IMLI 12 Mei yg lalu and tak perasan pulak rupanya Del yg tanya...

Apa2 pun, sori takdan nak respond awal. Saya sbnrnya jarang sempat bukak yahoo mail ni. Sibuk dgn kerja.. tambah internet connection kat libya ni tak reliable & kdg2 je dpt. Ni pun baru sempat baca e-mel yahoo yg dah b'lambak sbb baru settle handle delegation dari early last week. So, ada break sat.

FYI, mmg kitaorg kat sini cover Malta sekali. Malta ni negara kecik je. Rakyatnya pun sikit, tak sampai stgh juta org. Mostly kristian. Tapi, sbb negara EU, cost of living mmg mahal ler kat situ. Depa guna Euro... baru je start Januari tahun ni. Ttg cuaca, mmg nice.. ada 4 musim dgn mediterranean weather! (berangin & rather cold during winter). Selain nak cari makanan halal agak susah sbb tak ramai org islam, harga sewa rumah & kereta kat sini agak mahal jugak. Masjid pun just ada satu je kat negara tu. Setakat ni, hanya ada 2 famili rakyat malaysia kat malta - sorg org melayu islam dari terengganu & sorg lagi chinese lady yg kawin dgn org malta. Both of them r nice people. Other than that, ada ler 2 org tahanan rakyat m'sia kat dlm penjara malta tu... Sebab kes depa b'dua yg kena tangkap menyeludup dadah since Feb this year, org m'sia yg masuk malta kena periksa ketat sikit. Sebelum tu, kitaorg pegi sana takde masalah langsung.

Anyhow, kitaorg mmg mengalu-alukan sgt kalau Mahiz & Del nak dtg ke Malta. Sbb negara komanwel, tak perlu visa pun. Kalau jadi bagi tau ler... boleh tlg introducekan korg dgn rakyat m'sia kat sana. En. Ismail org terengganu yg dok sana tu, kerja jadi chef hotel palace. So, nak cari makanan halal pun, dia boleh tolong ler.. (bukan setakat utk beli, siap boleh tlg masakkan lagi... )

Generally, kalau nak study kat malta, mmg bagus. Tak byk distraction. Senang nak concentrate study. Cuaca & tempat pun nice. Bab makan jelah. Utk communicate, dorg semua boleh cakap Bi, walaupun ada bahasa depa sendiri (called Maltese language). Saya dah cuba dapatkan maklumat psl IMLI melalui official channel, tapi belum dpt respond lagi. Sori to say, but knowing how their foreign ministry work, i don't think dorg akan jawab anytime soon sbb kementerian luar dorg sufer from lack of staff. Only about 100 diplomats kat ministry tu utk cover the whole world (termasuk kat luar negara). Pegawai yg jaga asia pun sorg je kat valetta tu... jenuh dia nak handle lebih 60 buah negara! So, info yg ada melalui website tu should be reliable & sufficient enough. In terms of standard of education pun, should not be a problem. Apa2 pun, dah mintak tolong en. ismail utk tlg cuba dptkan maklumat jugak. Nanti, kalau dia dpt or ada apa2 maklumat lain ttg MILI tu, insyaALLAH saya sampaikan.

Btw, hisham kat sini sorg je skrg. Izad & Muzoffar ada kat m'sia sbb Izad akan b'salin insyaALLAH early julai nanti.

Setakat ni jelah dulu. Kalau ada apa2 nak tanya lagi, boleh e-mel kat my personal official e-mel at khairil@kln.gov.my.

Kirim salam kat semua member2 & take care!

Salam takzim dari Tripoli,

...................................

(KHAIRIL HISHAM)

Embassy of Malaysia

Tripoli, GSPLAJ

Legal Lacuna For Guantanamo Detainees: A Battle Between What is Legally Right and Morally Wrong

2008-06-27T18:37:00.000-07:00

I presented a topic entitled 'Legal Lacuna For Guantanamo Detainees: A Battle Between What is Legally Right and Morally Wrong' in Diskusi Syariah dan Undang-Undang USIM. These are some of my readings:

In dealing with the detainees kept at Guantanamo, there are some absence in law which are open to interpretations. The interpretations given may not be in tandem with the spirit of the law, or even contrary to human rights – or there may exist abuse of law for immoral aims – benefiting therefrom.

The whole background of the issue started from, or I’d rather say, had its turning point from the Sept 11 attack on the headquarters of the United States Department of Defence in the national capital region of Pennyslvania and on the WTC in New York.

Immediately after the attack, the UN Security Council issued a resolution –the 1373 Resolution 2001 affirming its unequivocal condemnation of the terrorist attacks and expressing its determination to prevent all such acts. The resolution also affirmed the need to combat by all means threats to international peace and security caused by terrorist acts.

Seven days after the attack, the government of US under the presidency of George W.Bush issued a Joint Resolution (AUMF) – Authorization for use of Military Force which authorized the President to use the US Armed Forces against those responsible for the attacks launched against the US. It was the first time the right of self defence was mentioned, where the resolution renders that it was necessary and appropriate for the US to exercise its rights to self defence to protect the US citizens.
In general, the President is authorized to use all necessary and appropriate force against nations / organizations / persons the President determines planned / authorized / committed / aided the terrorist attack.

Firmly believing that Al-Qaeda was the responsible organization, the US began hunting those connected to prevent from ‘future attack’, if I could quote. And believing also that the Taliban had supported and provided safe haven to the organization, the President ordered the armed forces of U.S to invade Afghanistan. In issuing hostilities, hundreds of individuals were captured and later transferred to Guantanamo Bay at Cuba. Guantanamo Bay is a naval camp in Cuba leased by the U.S government as a detention camp.

The detainees where detained as early as in the year 2001 and were kept indefinitely and has been now nearly 7 years, except for a few who were deported. The detainees were kept without knowing the reason of the detention, the evidence used by the US which caused to the detention and what charge and which court their case will be brought to – something which was uncertain not only to them but also to the government as well.

Being criticized for such uncertainty, the Congress of the US came up with a Military Order : Detention, Treatment and Trial of Certain Non-Citizens in the War Against Terrorism. This Military order is also known as the November 13 Order.

The November 13 order placed its findings that the attack by the international terrorist (including members of al-Qaeda) has created a state of armed conflict, and this justifies the use of the US armed forces. It is stated that if the terrorist are not detected and prevented, mass death , injuries and massive destruction of property may happen. And because of the ability of the US to protect its citizen, as well as its allies, it is as if a responsibility that the US armed forces must be deployed.

Another significant aspect of the November 13 order is that it is necessary for individuals subject to this order to be detained and tried for violations of laws of war or military tribunals and that it is not practicable to apply principles of law and rules of evidence generally applied in the US courts.

The November 13 Order applies only to individuals who is not a US citizen of whom there is reason to believe that he is or was the member of al-Qaeda, or has engaged, abetted, conspired to commit international terrorism and those in the interest of the US that such individual should be subject to this order.

The order provides minimal protection to the detainees – that they will be treated humanely, given adequate food, drinking water, shelter, clothing and medical treatment and allowed free exercise of religion.

This order provides punishment which includes life imprisonment or death.

Next, was the memorandum issued by the White House in Feb 7, 2002 which states the US’s stand on the status of the detainees.

In an armed conflict a person can only be one of either two status; i.e whether he does not involved at all with the war or those who have laid down their arms – he is then considered as a civilian whom rights are protected under the 3rd GC. The 3rd GC in its Common Article 3 stipulates among others that they must not be subject to violence, torture and humiliating and degrading treatment etc

On the other hand, if a person who is a member of armed forces or militias or organized resistance movements, they are also protected by the 4th GC – as POW.

Now, back to the memorandum, the US government declared that
(i) GC does not apply to their conflict with Al-Qaeda in Afghanistan or elsewhere because al-Qaeda is not a High Contracting party.
(ii) However, GC only applies to Taliban – as a de facto government
(iii) That Com.Art 3 does not apply to both al-Qaeda and Taliban because the conflict was international not non-international in character.
(iv) Taliban are unlawful combatants, thus do not qualify as POW
(v) And that Al-Qaeda do not qualify as POW too.

Now, having nearly 500 detainees from at least 35 countries, and having kept for such an indefinite tme, without proper charge , the detainees have urged the US courts to grant Habeas Corpus. The next question which arises is can an alien be given such ‘privilege litigation’ in a US federal courts? The US government argued that it does not extend to aliens in military custody who have no presence in ‘any territory which the US is sovereign”. They put forward the case of Johnson v Esentrager. However the court distinguished the two cases, and based its judgments on merits. The court positively held that ‘the detainees are being held indefinitely without the benefit of any legal proceeding to determine ther status, and that it is the primary reason of Habeas Corpus as a mean to challenge executive detentions especially without trial.

In response to that, the Pentagon established procedures called the CSRT – Combatant Status Review Tribunal to determine the status of the detainees. The tribunal is based on administrative procedures in traditional wars which determined the status of POW. , here to determine that they are not ‘enemy combatant.’ The detainees are however given the opportunity to present reasonably available evidence and witness to prove, but they are not allowed the full access to the govt’s evidence or counsel of ther own choice. The CSRTs are not bound by the rules of evidence and the govt’s evidence is presumed to be “genuine and accurate.” As a result of this CSRT procedures, 520 enemy combatants were declared “enemy combatant”.

The case of Khalid v Bush DDC 2005, was not much of help to the Guantanamo detainees. The court , eventhough ruled that the AUMF contains no geographical boundaries, the state of war does not give a blank check to the president. But at the same time, the court found that the exising international law instrument could not protect the detainees at least for the time being , until an dunless further actions are embarked by the President as a cause of complaint.

Another case in 2005 –In Re Guantanamo Detainee Cases - shocked the US government when Judge Green held that the CSRT doesn’t not meet the standards of justice, when it was the only hope / mean where the detainees could address or defend their detention status. Not only that she contended that evidence may possibly be involuntarily obtained and that the meaning of ‘enemy combatant’ was a loose one.

Because of the inconsistencey of the court’s decision, and some which are not in favor of the government, the Congress passed Detainee Treatment Act 2005 – which revoked court’s jurisdiction to hear application of habeas corpus from aliens. The Supreme Court in the case of Hamdan v Rumsfield in 2006 however declines to accept this strip of power by the government.

Due to that, another act was introduce, this time acknowledging the MC – Military Commisisons Act 2006 which does not only revoke the US courts jurisdiction but disallows the GC to be invoked in any habeas corpus and that the President has the power to interpret the GC provisions. Immediately after the enforcement of the Act, the government filed motions to dismiss all habeas corpus decision.

Thus on the applications of habeas corpus to the US courts, I submit that the government of US have been relying on legal avenues, if not creating legal avenues to continue keeping the detainees, as the war is not yet over. Legally, this may have its standing, but morally, can the perceived fight for rights and justice by the US justify the denial of rights on others, among others and in particular the Guantanamo detainees.

On the issue of Self defence.
Legally, the international law allows the right of self defence under Article 51 of the UN Charter. But the question here is was there an actual imminent threat or danger?
Morally, can the US expand the use of self defence to preemptive self defence?
Morally, can preemptive self defence be invoked to justify the invasion of the US army in Afghanistan, turning the whole picture around – to the use of the defence as a sword when it should be used as a shield?

On the issue of torture.
Legally, the detainees are said to not have the POW status who enjoys protection in the 4th GCPOW.
Morally, does that mean that the detainees have no human rights at all?
Legally, even if POW status cannot be invoked, the law says that no state of war or threat of war can be the justification of torture – in the UN Torture Convention.
Morally, is it right to derogate from the rule?

Legally, the US invoked the doctrine of derogation as mentioned in Art 4 of IICPR and ECHR.
Morally, was the doctrine of derogation used proportionately?
Morally, does the necessity of derogation exist?
Conclusion
With all the points delivered, I submit and support several suggestions:
1- the detainees shd be formally charged with accepted standards of fairness. If such fairness could not be provided or no evidence obtained,m the detainees should be released.
2- No statement obtained as a result of torture or human degrading treatment should be admitted as evidence.
3- The MC is not independent because it is under the Secretary of Defence – Excutive power not an independent judiciary
4- The DTA is discriminatrory on non-citizens to be tried in MC which has a lower standard of justice as compared to US courts.

Lastly, law and morality should at all time be in the affirmative with each other eventhough the former is enforceable while the latter could not.It is eventually consciousness that drives human's decision.

Grief for the Loss of Pulau Batu Puteh

2008-05-23T17:11:00.000-07:00

The two-hour judgment was something I have awaited for. I have been following its trials from day one.The first more-or less one-hour judgement by His Excellency Vice President Al-Khasawneh gave hope for a decision favouring Malaysia, if not sounded like favoring Malaysia. It however became to the contrary when the court progressed in its decision.
I managed to grasp a handful of reasonings answering to the questions put forward before and during the trials.
The court had established the Kingdom of Johore's sovereignty over the disputed maritime features as in its judgement that at least from the seventeenth century until early in the nineteenth century, the territorial and maritime domain of the Kingdom of Johor comprised a considerable portion of the Malaya Peninsula, straddled the Straits of Singapore and included islands and islets in the area of the Straits. Specifically, this domain included the area where Pedra Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh is located.

What later caught my attention was the court's observation that that sovereignty comprises both elements, personal and territorial, when commenting on the existence of Orang Laut. The Kingdom of Johor satisfied both.
The judgement read:
79. With regard to Singapore’s assertion about the existence of a “traditional Malay concept of sovereignty” based on control over people rather than on control over territory, the Court observes that sovereignty comprises both elements, personal and territorial. In any event, it need not deal with this matter any further as the Court has already found that Johor had territorial sovereignty over Pedra Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh (see paragraph 69 above), and has found confirmation of this title in the Sultan of Johor’s exercise of authority over the Orang Laut, who inhabited or visited the islands in the Straits of Singapore, including Pedra Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh.

When Singapore brought the issues of the 1824 Anglo-Dutch Treaty which divided the Kingdom of Johor into two excluding the disputed maritime features to be in any of the divisions, of which Singapore claimed terra nullius, the court observed that against this background, it is most unlikely that the parties intentionally left these maritime features within the Straits of Singapore outside the sphere of influence of either of the two parties and open for eventual occupation by one of the parties or another power.

The court ,after deliberating on issues of letter of donation 1825, made a conclusion that Malaysia has established to the satisfaction of the Court that as of the time when the British started their preparations for the construction of the lighthouse on Pedra Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh in 1844, this island was under the sovereignty of the Sultan of Johor.

I thought that when the status quo of the island is determined, it would then create a slim chance for Singapore to claim sovereignty over the disputed maritime features. I was wrong. The court's direction was then to decide on whether the sovereignty has passed to Singapore by looking at the conducts of the parties. The court mentioned that the title of sovereignty may be passed either by written agreement or by tacit conduct. On the latter, the court moved on to include the failure of the State which has sovereignty to respond to conduct à titre de souverain of the other State - in lay terms, the failure to stop the excercise of soveregnty of another state which has no sovereignty.

At this point, I knew that that Malaysia's fate is going to another direction. It was further mentioned in the judgement that the absence of reaction may well amount to acquiescence. The concept of acquiescence “is equivalent to tacit recognition manifested by unilateral conduct which the other party may interpret as consent.

The Court observes that there is nothing at all in the record before it to suggest that the authorities in Singapore considered it necessary or even desirable to inform the Johor authorities of the decision about the siting of the lighthouse or to seek any consent in respect of it. That conduct may be interpreted in one of two ways: it may indicate, as Malaysia contends, that what it sees as Johor’s 1844 consent to the building and operation of a lighthouse on one of its islands simply
applied to Pedra Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh as it would have to any of its islands. Or it may indicate,as Singapore contends, that the Johor authorities had no rights in respect of this project and that such was the perception in 1847 of the responsible British authorities.

To me, the assumptions made by the court are possible, of which at the material time only Singapore has the answer. As on the part of Malaysia, it would be better to hope for the first one - a good conscience -. But being of good conscience appears to be not enough.

Eventhough there was a quite a stiff argument on the existence of Horsburgh Lighthouse - which deteriorated into this dispute, Malaysia had respectfully acknowledged Singapore's operation of it all this while and is very much ready to continue its operation onwards. With due respect, Malaysia claimed that Singapore's involvement on the Island was only limited to the building and the operation of the lighthouse which does not give the right to claim sovereignty over the Island. (In this particular aspect, I wonder what would the Islamic point of view be - on Ihya' al-Mawat - cultivating the dead lands , I personally think Sngapore has a stand on this point).

The conducts of the parties examined by the court was a long test for Malaysia. It stemmed back in the year 1844 to 1852 and then 1852 to 1952 and then 1952 to present. Within the period, Singapore laid a number of enactments supporting their administrative control on the islands. These were of weight to the court. The court however excluded the Protected Places Order 1991 which prohibits entry, without permit, to that island. Malaysia contended that this 1991 order should not be construed by the court because t came after the dispute had taken place. Malaysia was correct when it says that is not “a normal continuation of prior acts” a de ja vu phrase taken from the case of Sovereignty over Pulau Ligitan and Pulau Sipadan
(Indonesia/Malaysia).

In my point of view, the part where the court accepted the Secretary of State of Johore letter 1953 was a definite drawback.Malaysia tried to strike the letter out so as not to be taken as basis of Singapore's argument on two basis: first, that the Secretary has no authority to issue the statement and second, that the letter was on 'ownership' , not 'sovereignty'. The court rejected both. The letter created an estoppel which made Singapore continue the operation of the lighthouse as its predecessor.

Malaysia pointed out that a Petroleum Agreement was entered into in 1968 with Continental Oil Company of Malaysia following the anticipated boundaries of the 1969 Indonesia-Malaysia Continental Shelf Agreement of which Singapore made no protest. Malaysia also pointed out Indonesia-Malaysia Continental Shelf Agreement 1969 and Territorial Sea Agreement 1970 and official documents and maps of Malaysia.

In just one sentence, His Excellency made his judgement:
"For the foregoing reasons, the Court concludes that sovereignty over Pedra
Branca/Pulau Batu Puteh belongs to Singapore."

That was the end of it..as if I have forgotten the remaining two -Middle Rocks and South Ledge.

Luckily, Malaysia's persistency - by the effort of Malaysian delegates/agents - on MiddleRock and Southledge to be equally important as Pulau Batu Puteh should be praised. Malaysia made it firm to the court the both the Island should be treated as independent islands. Since the court has approved the Kingdom of Johor's title over it and nothing was done by Singapore to show against as it did to Pulau Batu Puteh, the court mantained the sovereignty of Middle Rocks to Malaysia.
As for South ledge, the court said “International treaty law is silent on the question whether low-tide elevations
can be considered to be ‘territory’. Nor is the Court aware of a uniform and
widespread State practice which might have given rise to a customary rule which
unequivocally permits or excludes appropriation of low-tide elevations . . ." The court went on deciding, sovereignty over South Ledge, as a low-tide elevation, belongs to the State in the territorial waters of which it is located.

Learning to Accept the Court's Decision

It is the spirit of respect of nation, love of peace and upholding the international law that Malaysia and Singapore had decided to be abide by a third party decision. Whatever the outcome of the decision, Malaysia has tuned itself to accept it. Malaysia is matured enough to think on the best method to settle disputes, what more a sensitive dispute like Pulau Batu Puteh. It is by looking at the future bond between Malaysia and Singapore that both are professional enough to achieve to this understanding. It is not hard to understand Malaysians reaction on this.Malaysian still have the right however to feel sad and grief on the loss of Pulau Batu Puteh which had once been under its sovereignty. I personally feel the loss.

Hafiz's Engagement

2008-05-19T08:05:00.000-07:00

It was my niece's engagement day. He and his family has been a lot of help to all our family's wedding ceremony, and so I will surely not miss their's! Quite happy finding myself of help.The unofficial camerawoman , though very amateur. I had problems in capturing sharp pictures. Guess I have to find a good external flash..and lense..or even a new camera...p:
Here are some pictures I have tried to save:

I hardly get to know my neice to be...pictures first, taaruf later..hhihi

Since my nephew is not around, I only got the chance to shoot my niece to be.Hafiz is trying hard to stick to custom...I said, "just follow us, and wait in the car.."eheh.

Very limited pictures taken. I wish I could shoot like Saifulnang and gang. By the time I got the chance to shoot, my desired target has run away...

Zulfa talks a lot now

2008-05-15T20:23:00.000-07:00

I envy my friends who are able to teach their kids english well.I wish I could be as constant in speaking english as they are.I have tried to mix speaking english with bahasa with Zulfa, and I think she understands what I say -well,provided that I accompany them with gestures.

Me: Zulfa dont 'pukul' your brother Muadz. (gesture of 'pukul')
Me: If you 'pukul'/ hit your brother Muadz, he will cry.. (action of crying and introducing the word 'hit'.
Me: Come here Zulfa.
Zulfa: Zulfa nak lukis lagi..(sambil menunjukkan lukisan)
Me: Are you drawing Muadz?
Zulfa: Ha'ah ini Muadz la..
Me: Where is Amir then?
Zulfa: Nanti Zulfa lukis Amiir pegang tangan Zulfa.
Me: Where is the Sun?
Zulfa: Kejap. Ha...dah siap.Ini sun.
Me: What about some flowers on Zulfa's baju (rasanya dia belum tahu perkataan baju).
Zulfa: Ha'ah, Zulfa lupa. Zulfa nak lukis banyak-banyak flowers...dan star.

That is what happens when she is really in....drawing. She can spend hours. And its astonishing that she can actually immitate the way I draw - for instant hair first then the face, or face frst then the eyes and the rest.

She enjoys watching Barney and Sesame Street. She remembers the songs well. I think English can be well learnt through songs.

In the middle of many things...

2008-05-15T18:50:00.000-07:00

I just do not have the chance to write in my blog because of being so busy.
How work has taken my precious hobby!
Even though we have flexible hours of working, I end up going to work 8 to 5. It's much easier though having someone taking after Muadz at home. Zulfa goes to an arabic kindergarten near the university. But she wakes up at 1 o'clock almost every day and misses her morning class. The teacher has done everything to wake her up.

I happened to meet Kak Farahin yesterday...

"Kita berjumpa di mana ya, kak..UIA ke SMAPK ke?" Aku cuba mencari titik perjumpaan dengan Kak Farahin.Aku terjumpa dengan Kak Farahin sewaktu makan di kantin fakulti. Dia sedang mengikuti kursus SLAB untuk melayakkannya sambung masters di luar negara.
"Di SMAPK lah Fadhilah." Bimbang juga aku Kak Farahin terasa kecil hati.Tetapi lebh baik aku berterus terang.Dia adalah seorang doktor perubatan dan kini 'attached' dengan USIM sebagai tenaga pengajar perubatan USIM.
"Ooh ya.." Sekarang semuanya semakin jelas. Aku ketika itu di dalam tingkatan empat manakala kak Farahin di dalam tingkatan lima.
"Aku tidaklah sepopular mana dahulu. Ingat juga kak Farahin tentang aku." Fikirku.
Kami bersembang panjang di pejabatku. Jam sudah menghampiri pukul 2 petang.
"Kakak minta diri. Slot seterusnya bermula pukul dua." Kak Farahin dengan kawannya bangun ke muka pintu pejabat.
"Tunggu Kak, Mastura." Mastura juga seorang doktor perubatan.
"Ini kad saya. Kalau singgah di Nilai lagi, marilah ke blik saya. Manalah tahu hendak solat ke..apa-apa sahajalah." Aku menghulurkan kad. Tujuannya adalah untuk memberikan nombor telefonku.Mereka mengamati kad tersebut.
"Fadhilah,kamu ada kakak?" Tanya Kak Farahin seblum beredar.
"Ermmm...kalau orang itu lebih tua dari saya,itu sudah tentu bukan kakak saya kerana saya tidak ada kakak. Tetapi kalau lebih muda itu, mungkin. Kerana saya ada ramai adik." Kataku. Aku sudah biasa dengan soalan sebegitu. Mungkin ramai yang mempunyai wajah seiras denganku.
"Mastura, Fadhilah ini kakak kepada Nuun." Kata Kak Farahin membuat kesimpulan.Aku mengangguk kehairanan.
"Ya ke? Kakak Nuun?" Kecil betul dunia ini.
"Macam mana kakak mengenali dia?" Tanyaku. Pening juga kerana ketika adikku Nora masuk ke SMAPK, aku dan Kak Farahin sudah lama keluar.
"Internet friend." Kata Kak Farahin.
Aku terimbau kenangan bersama adikku itu.
"Nora, sudah-sudahlah tu mengadap komputer tu..." Kataku.
"Time masak ni." Sambungku lagi.
"Takpe, Along masak dulu nasi dengan...apa along kata nak masak tadi?Percik?Ha...masak dulu kejap lagi Nora buat sambal belacan dan sayur." Laungnya kembali.
"Hmmm...kalau mak balik habis dia ni." Aku kata di dalam hati.
"Baik aku mula memasak. Paling kurang bila mak pulang taklah kena marah. Lebih-lebih lagi bila tengok Nora mengadap komputer." Kataku di dalam hati.
Nora dan rakan-rakannya di Universiti Multimedia memang galak menggunakan internet untuk berkominikasi. Aku selalu kagum melihat mereka. Mereka mempunyai dunia lain di alam digital.Aku, kalau aku chatting sekalipun, nak chatting dengan siapa? Kawan-kawan aku kebanyakannya masih buta IT. Tidak sehebat Nora dan rakan-rakannya. Penggunaan internet belum lagi popular di UIA pada 1996.

"Nuun pernah jemput akak di KLIA sewaktu akak pulang dari Australia dahulu." Kak Farahin mengejutkan aku dari lamunan.
"Pernah jemput akak?" Tanyaku. Bagiku kalau sudah sampai tahap menjemput d lapangan terbang, ia bermakna mereka berdua memang berkawan rapat.
"Ya Allah, rindunya aku kepada adikku.." Laungku di dalam hati.
"Rupanya ada banyak perkara kebaikan yang kau buat aku tidak tahu, Nora." Aku menahan airmata dari bergenang.Sebab itulah dia begitu komited dengan komputernya. Dia mempunyai kawan-kawan sejati yang sentiasa mendoakannya sehingga ke hari ini.
"Akak juga pernah terserempak dengan Amiir di Warta membeli baju raya dengan mak kamu." Sambung Kak Farahin. Aku mengangguk.
"Suami Nora pula adalah kawan saya di KISAS." Ujar Mastura.
Kami terdiam seketika. Kecil sungguh dunia ini. Setelah bersalaman, Kak Farahin dan Mastura beredar.
Aku tersandar di kerusi pejabatku...

2007-07-08T23:33:00.000-07:00

PEKANFEST 2007 - TANJUNG LUMPUR, KUANTAN

not bad,ain't it?

Zulfa di Hilton,Kuching

2007-01-30T07:41:00.000-08:00

Enjoy these pictures!

Zoo Negara

2007-01-10T21:21:00.000-08:00

Lepas pertunjukan gajah.

Amiir dan Zulfa pulun nasi lemak - bawak dari rumah. Pedas tu..

Faiz tgh pegang parrot macau - nama dia Pearl. Ifah tgh dukung Zulfa.

Malas nak berjalan la tu...

Zulfa konfiden main slide semenjak dibiar main sendiri di McDonalds Bangi.

Mama and Zulfa pergi kenduri kawin

2007-01-10T21:04:00.000-08:00

Panas betul hari tu..balik tu, Zulfa terus demam. Kesian dia. Dia suka pergi kenduri sebab dpt tengok tarian zapin kanak-kanak (abg apin, anak jiran sebelah rumah masuk). Siap senget-senget lagi Zulfa cuba nak mengikut diorang menari. Del pulak tgh pregnant 5 bulan. Tak lama lagi Zulfa nak ada adik.

Zulfa pakai baju poney - beli pakai kupon dan waktu sale - ok tak?

Kek Sarawak

2007-01-10T20:43:00.000-08:00

Inilah dia kek-kek pada pagi hari raya. Semuanya home-made, kecuali satu (yang hijau coklat tu). Nanti bila ada masa nanti, del akan postkan resepinya. Semua kek ni, kak ijun (kakak ipar) yang ajar. Siapa nak belajar boleh bagitahu...

kek ini namanya kek lapis india. Agak popular sekarang di Sarawak, kek moden - sebab pakai kepingan coklat cadbury. Kos mahal sikit, tapi seeedaaap.

Kek baju harimau. Kek ini disukai mak-mak- sebab ada buah prune, jadi rasa dia masam manis.

kek buah kukus...yummy

bigger version - memang best waktu baru siap.Puas hati.

kek sri balas..cubaan pertamaku..

yang ini kak ijun buat. namanya kek pangako sa'yo.....kisah angelo dan yna tu...sekarang ni baru box 11, lagi 5..waaa...

Beraya di kampung bapak...

2007-01-10T20:34:00.000-08:00

Pada pagi hari raya aidilfitri di Kampung Pendam Samarahan, Sarawak. Tengah panas terik.

comel tak? nama dia Najwa, sepupu Zulfa.

amiir..

2006-02-19T20:04:00.000-08:00

semalam bawak zulfa baby photogenic contest kat JJ. sja untuk exposure.susah pulak nak buat dia posing.serves me right, patutnya practise la dulu dpn kamera skali dua kat umah.Ingat nak bawak amir, tapi tak smpt nak bgtau baba..kut2 diorg ada programme lain.sian dia.nangis masa kitorang nak kuar..setiap kali dia nak ikut mesti rasa terharu...tak sampai hati.

balik malam tu, terus bawak amir kuar isi minyak, tinggal zulfa kat umah jap...peluk2 dia(oops lupa nak bgtau baba...faizal, along bwk gi kejap je).Dlm hati, terasa lengkap keluarga amir, dah ada mak.Dan nampaknya amir tu dah manja ngan mak dia.

tgk amir, ada ketumbit (memang perkara biasa lam kuarga kitorang). Umi amiir pun ada ketumbit dekat2 akhir hayat dia dulu..Amiir ni ada ketumbit pun riang tak ingat..dia suka panggil nama orang..maklong,..mak loooong....bodek nombor satu. Nyanyi lagu lonely la.....cepat mengikut.Bila zulfa nak pandai ckp mcm amir?tak lama lagi kot, zulfa byk mengikut amir..

terbawak2 dlm mimpi. Mimpi nora, pakai baju baru, tudung bulat pink...tgh siap2 mcm nak pgi keje..aku tegur...'lawa mak engkau hari ni miir...' dia sengih mcm biasa. dlm hati, budak nora cantik pulak dia gosok tudung dan baju (biasanya ala kadar je, mcm aku), nak pulak dia pakai pink...

mainan mimpi je kut, sebab rindu.

20 months now

2006-02-19T19:51:00.000-08:00

'This month, you may observe -- or experience -- your child hitting, pushing, biting or tugging to get his way. You'll need to calmly make clear that such actions are never acceptable'

yeah, true to some extent. She likes to bite. And tugging.And she also made it clear that at certain points she insists on something, with urgency.Tu yang payah tuh. gauk juak mbiak tuk..

kali ni kali yang ke 5 kot zulfa dibawak ke swimming pool.Tapi kali ni pakai bj mandi alang dan anjang dia beli. Tgk anak dr. magda mandi.bestgak.I think its about time to teach zulfa some instructions in arabic. I myself have to learn them.not proper long instructions, but simple ones...

yesterday i tried a few...

a ti mama... (bak sini)
al-qalam haqqu mama.. (pen mama punya)
zulfa...
mama abki.... (mama nangis?)
uwa....
a ti mama...
mama urid al-qalam..(mama nak pen)
shufi mama ...(tengok mama)
al-qalam ma fih..(takde pen)sambil tunjuk tangan takde pen
uwaa...

breakfast sesama

2006-01-26T21:57:00.000-08:00

best gak pagi tadi.Dengan ifah, nawal dan zulfa pegi jalan-jalan cari makan. Kitorang boleh jadi histeria kalau nasi lemak tak sedap..heh.Pantang ada tempat yang ada special menu, mesti serbu (yang dekat dan mampu je la)..lepas tu masing-masing buat ulasan, tang ingredient la. Kitorang tgh kumpul menu / resipi family. Hanya yang terbaik aje akan diendorse oleh kitorang dan akan jadi resipi rasmi keluarga (ever heard anybody like us?).

semalam ifah buat kek coklat. tgh bakar baru dia perasan kek menitik. rupanya aku lupa set api atas-bawah, sebab biasanya buat kek lapis main api atas jek..sian ifah.Tak puas hatila tu.

abah nak ikut kitorang breakfast, tapi dia sibuk gotong royong potong rumput kawin faizal ahad nih..kalau tak abah 'on' je..dulu-dulu, tgh mlm pun boleh tetiba kuar mkn dgn abah.

my mice laboratory

2006-01-24T00:09:00.000-08:00

we had a great time in the class today. it was hard explaining the law of agency and partnership at one blow. i declared to the students that sincerely, they were under experiment, my mini mice laboratory..hahaha: coz i'm squeezing as many law related as possible in their commercial law pot. imagine how tight it get especially when there are too many holidays this semester!

one student said, then i must be the cat!

i asked one student to read a provision ( which was more like a typewriting robot reading)..it was real fun when we tried to get the robot mouse read with feelings. Like Barney said: 'Gee, its sure hard to become a robot coz robots cant feel happy or sad!'But this robot eventually has feelings after all when she was joyously excited when class time finishes...

Remind me of Amiir and Zulfa singing (acting towards the song in Barney)...He's a little robot...

determining 'importance' and 'urgency'

2006-01-24T00:00:00.000-08:00

i think i have a problem. i always regard everything as important and i end up doing nothing until everything really get to be urgent! how i wish to be consistent (like some others i know) accomplishing those important tasks before grasping my breath towards deadlines? (though i always manage to meet deadlines, and most of the time: half dead)

no matter how canggih sekalipun your organizer is, what matters most is DISCIPLINE!

by the way, is blogging necessary? is it a waste of time?
its very slow especially when uploading pictures.that upsets me.

My Leo

2006-01-22T18:23:00.000-08:00

Have you ever sat back and wonder how great your husband is? If I were to list all the good things about my husband, I would'nt have enough papers! And if I were at his place, I think I wont be able to be as good as he is. A family man he is.I don't have to do the 'honey do things'list, he seems far ahead of me. To him, Zulfa and me is his prime priority... I have my own 'Leo' afterall...eheheh (Penangan Sana'y Wala Nang Wakas la ni...)

jodoh di tangan tuhan

2006-01-20T19:37:00.000-08:00

It has already been 1 year since my sister nora has passed away. And eversince, Amiir (her son) has been with us (my mom). He has the eyes of my sister...

And its only a few days left before he is gonna get a new mum and a new brother..The best part is, the new mum is actually one of my sister's closest friend, Jawahir.
To Faizal and Jawahir, May Allah bless the both of you...
To Jawahir, Ahlan Wa Sahlan to our family.
The wedding news broke and it was a news of happiness for all three families ( faizal's, ours and Jawahir's)..Mohamad is gonna get a father and Amiir, a mother.

Mak said, apart from Jawahir being one of Nora's best friend,her family was also a family friend nearly twenty years back in England. Back in Bangi, these two girls studied together for their PMR, yeah I can still remember picking nora up from her home.After PMR, they led their own ways, until the last time I met Jawahir when she gave birth to Mohamad at Azzahra...a difficult moment for her, especially knowing that her husband has passed away.

Everything is arranged. Allah knoweth best of everything.

Woops..Watch Out!!

2005-10-23T22:47:00.000-07:00

This picture was taken just about time when Irfan starts to vomit...luckily it didn't spill on Zulfa's head...hehhe.
I was enjoying my time watching these children playing happily...many friends from among CMIS families.Mdm Ramziah's daughter is in the picture too.

Accompanying bapak to play volleyball...both Zulfa and bapak are wearing sports tee-shirt. Wonder whom Zulfa resembles the most, bapak or me??

See water dripping!!! She's teething...

Auntie Dina, Uncle Saibi...anxiously waiting for their baby to be born..sabaq..

Zulfa's first raya

2005-10-23T22:26:00.000-07:00

She was born slightly a few days after raya last year..Her aunt UmmuAmiir was still around that time, and zulfa was still sufferring jaundis - yellow all-over. (Wonder how Amiir and AbuAmiir is celebrating raya without their loved one..Alfatihah) I dreamt a lot of UmmuAmiir this ramadhan, maybe because I have been thinking about her so much.

This is the first time her mama has to go around searching baju raya for a child, its quite weird though, eventually, I am among those mamas in the busy superstores..Well, it didnt take a long time for choosing, but it was time consuming when it came for queing to pay. Luckily, Alang Najihan volunteered to do the queing part..Zulfa has already dozed off on mama's shoulders...This year is Alang Najihah's last year as a bachelor.Next year, she'll have a share of this experience ,insyAllah.

on the way to Kuala Lumpur...searching for baju raya, and tudung for Najihan's wedding...

in Alang Najihan's (DeQ An)car.Behind: Anwar Faiz.He is the most humble little brother..obedient, masyaAllahh.

An Analytical Study on Dining at Tarbush: Worth Going or Cooking at Home?

2005-10-09T23:06:00.000-07:00

Thats my new topic of research in conjunction to my husband's birthday...It's supposed to be a secret..hushhh...Tarbush has to be really, REALLY good so as not to ruin this birthday..Hypothesis of Research: That Tarbush provides excellent arab taste and surrounding minus the price, however, such taste delicacy can be produced at home.Contents of research: Service, Surrounding,Price, Menu...etc.

Ahlan Ya Ramadhan...

2005-10-06T22:34:00.000-07:00

It has been a long time since I have last updated my blog...many things happened though. Nilai campus is quite far from home. For a slow driver like me, it takes me at least half an hour everyday.Well, thats gonna be a routine , anyway.

Ramadhan is here. This time, I have to grab hold onto it. This ramadhan invites me with various feelings...am I a good Muslim?

Ibadah Camp...

2005-08-11T09:52:00.000-07:00

This was the first Ibadah Camp which I was not a committee..sedey. I saw students graduating every semester. It seemed that it was only yesterday they registered joining the college. Time has gone so fast.
My husband and I always sat together talking on how we see our students. There is no doubt that some really leave a bunch of memories to us, in whatever form it may be. Some made us laugh while some others make us sigh..and not a few also even managed to make us stop, ponder and think...seriously. Having experience as wardens, it put us in various positions, we had to console them and provide medication ( before proper medication) when they were sick, listen when they have problems , play and be their friends and sometimes scold them when certain problems arose. Some students even have - the biggest disciplinary problem - we have ever imagined, but we always put in mind that if they want to change, they can change far better than any of us , and we have seen some really have changed. A lot.. Allah yahdii...

Akma holding zulfa. Zulfa can't wait for her new friend in aunt akma's belly. Irfan is watching...he wanted to bring zulfa home!

Lovely Kak Ram....Dina looking at Zulfa and Kak Zah.

Kak Wan and Fifi. At 4 month, Fifi can hold her own bottle!

Tuanku Najihah Public Lecture

2005-08-11T09:31:00.000-07:00

Renaissance Hotel, KL

We had a public lecture on the harmonization of syariah and civil law in Malaysia, delivered by the Ketua Hakim Negara. Many judges came. I bet it was the time to at least know whom is whom. Worst, I was among the VIP usherer that day..their pictures with caps on didnt look the same as they appeared that day. Judges have typical styles...most of them are old..and they look so knowledgable.

The best part was, my lecturer was there...you know which one.. I told him I read a lot of his books..and he seemed happy (especially when out of a sudden the Ketua Hakim Negara quoted his name and book in his speech!)

Despite of the hazy KL - reached 400 EP, many turned up for the speech. It was soooo hazy. The haze had even entered the hotel! ( I walked with my colleague and she kept grumbling when we passed by some men who were smoking inside the hotel..what nasty brats!)

This is Tuanku Najihah. She dresses lovely..like pengantin everyday.Wish to see her wardrobe.

With Kak Yantie, Hendon and Yeni.

Head Down, Barely Looking at anyone..

2005-07-05T19:30:00.000-07:00

Law Library - School Days

Friend: Del , look there, our lecturer...
(The lecturer was very young, yet soooo serious, searching for cases in the MLJ section, head down, barely looking at anyone)

Law Faculty - School Days
Me: There he goes again, our lecturer, wonder why he is soo gloomy?
(The lecturer was walking passing us, head down, barely looking at anyone)
Me and my friend: Assalamualaikum sir
Lecturer: Waalaikum salam ( With a quizzical look)

Law Class - School Days

Friend: Del, eventually he laughs!
(My friend made a joke during presentation and made the lecturer laughed - without sound of course - still typical him)

Law Library - Today

I see his name everywhere - books, articles....
No wonder he was 'head-down, barely looking at anyone'..He was busy doing these work!

Me-Today

Head-down, barely looking at anyone,
oh no...

Bowling - Family Tournament

2005-07-05T19:20:00.000-07:00

Last sunday we had a nuclear-family-out-of-a sudden bowling tournament. These things can't be planned too much, or else it won't happen..
Abah and Mak went PD - bringing some family guests to PD, while we went out together - bowling and then Mc D - Faizal & Fahmi belanja...mekasih ye....
14 of us played - aiman and faiz in a different lane.
Amiir & Zulfa - played balloons.

The result of the tournament:
kambing - hanip, along, fahmi - 647
kerbau-faizal,muttaqqeen,diana - 458
TOTAL:1105
ayam - a.mahiz, ifah, ebot- 530
itik - hilmi, deq an, nawal - 524
TOTAL: 1054

WINNER: KAMBING & KERBAUUUU!!!!

Seeing friends...

2005-06-22T17:13:00.000-07:00

Naz accompanied me at the court.I wanted to take pictures coz we havent seen each for soo long...she is still the old nazeera I know, old nazeera but not old..hehe...maybe I can post pictures later.oops, got to go...departing to Port Dickson!

Excited with her new book..

2005-06-22T17:08:00.000-07:00

This book got real pictures inside.How to teach children interested in books??

There you go..distracted by the camera..

Gonna miss zulfa for two days..

2005-06-22T16:57:00.000-07:00

I have to attend a course at Port Dickson for two days...Zulfa has to bear her will-be-busy mama.

Secret Recipe-Banana Cake For Mummy

2005-06-13T08:49:00.000-07:00

I like the banana cake coz it has real banana inside, but I could guess what mummy would say "ler, nape ada pisang lam ni...jatuhla sikit standard kek nih"..hehe..(An expensive cake shouldn't have cheap banana inside...ehehe)..Well nowadays cheap things to us can be found in hotels with expensive labels!
We had a simple birthday celebration yet very chearful. (I can still remember, the last celebration, we did powerpoints - which made abah a little bit jealous and then curious for his next birthday)...(those days when ummuamiir was still around)..the truth is, whenever we had any celebration in conjunction with abah or mak's birthday, we actually meant for both of them...
Mak, selamat hari lahir, moga bahagia dunia akhirat..rabbanaghfirlana waliwalidaina warhamhuma kama rabbayana saghira...You have raised us up, all 10...you have sacrificed a lot.

The two sugar dolls (only one appeared in the picture) were for mummy's first 2 grandchildren...pengubat hati mak nowadays..satu untuk amiir dan satu untuk zulfa..saja suka-suka.

zulfa's milestone

2005-06-12T23:56:00.000-07:00

she is now starting to crawl!one step, two steps, then collapses. She also knows how to cling to objects and stand.She is so eager of her new discovery that even when bedtime comes she could'nt stop from it..as a result ...mama cant get her good night's sleep.

paksu aiman dgn amiir dan zulfa

Cousin Amiir is now learning how to walk..and babble.He is collecting new vocabs..
ummuzulfa: Amiir....sayang zulfa miir..
Amiir: muaaaaah....
ummuzulfa: pandai amiir
ummuzulfa: dah minum susu, amiir?
Amiir: lum..

(terkejut ummuzulfa, clear betul dia sebut 'lum' untuk belum)
Can't wait until he can talk, I can already imagine how intelligent this boy is...arwah ummuamiir always said that she wants to see amiir like his father, ulat buku.She bought him a book: Mimi's bath. I'll try to get good stuffs for him as well just as how I would do for baby zulfa.

Allah knows best. nahnu fi tafkeer, Allahu fi tadbeer...

new place..new spirit

2005-06-09T18:33:00.000-07:00

I see people around busy doing researches, articles..presenting papers,local and international. I'm taking up the challenges and should by now fix my targets.
These days I've been travelling around using public transport.Taxi,lrt,star,commuter...Feel like my old youth days.I had to really grip my handbag, I mean my marry poppin handbag - everything inside.Fear of snatchers. So, yesterday I bought my self a cheap napsack and put my stuffs inside, and walk like a jolly old student..I walk faster that way.

memorable mu'askar

2005-06-03T03:02:00.000-07:00

There was a compulsory course every student must undergo at least once during their studies at the university (International Univ.of Africa Sudan). I decided to follow eventhough I was only an intensive student.The other Malaysian sisters have already taken the course, so I was left alone, the only asian in the group. But I insisted to go, coz I know my Sudanese and Somalian friends are going as well. The kept me in good company.Well, this time the mu'askar (camping) was at Chandie, somewhere in north Sudan. Duration: 3 weeks..
It was good, the journey was so long..I saw deserts around me, hardly any tree. Occasionally we passed by some greeny patches of land with fresh fragrant of the grass.At times, we observed people living in small huts made of mud..we were so happy.Throughout the journey, my friends and I sung Sudanese patriotic songs ( I have forgotten most of it by now)...we sung to our lungs!
I can still remember when the bus suddenly stopped in the middle of the desert, I was wondering, only to know that everybody went off the bus, reaching the sand and performed tayammum..masha allah...how practical islam is...then one of them (Sofia Somali) determined the qiblah and there we went, prayed zuhur and asar - jamakqasar prayer. I learnt a lot from Sudan. Islam itself encourage muslims to go and walk on Allah's earth to discover the greatness of Allah..true, I cant help praising Him..the more I learn, the smaller I become.
Our main task in the mu'askar is to preach (dakwah) from village to village.We were devided into small groups. I was seperated from Halimo, but luckily managed to be one group with Chmadt Somali and Rahma Kenya.Everybody had to deliver something. They talked about topics like the duties of women as mothers, wife etc..big things, but when it came to me, guess what? I talked about the 'ethics of eating..' . Friends helped me to prepare the topic. ( I was only 3 months old in Sudan, but I gave it a good try). Friends told me that it doesnt matter if I got the grammars wrong, the audience only wanted to hear me speak..true, we had fun. I discovered that Malaysia has a very good reputation, many really wanted to go Malaysia. And they asked me what Malaysia is like and they adored my flowery baju kurung. I noticed one thing, the spirit of knowledge is very strong in Sudan. They like halaqah, speeches, forums, talks...not like in Malaysia where it is always difficult to find audience. And just wait until the Q&A session, it was always very hot.
Being the only Asian, I had to give a speech in one ceremony in Arabic...kung kang jugakla aku...tapi takpe, I didnt feel ashame at all, everybody was so supportive!

The Sudanese are so friendly. They slaughtered a kharoof just for the four of us! imagine that! Alhamdulillah I am able to adapt to the food..in the morning we normally have 'fuul' or 'adas' with fresh sheep milk...yum,yum...especially if you put na'na'(peppermint)..hmmm..very refreshing..then lunch and dinenr, we eat bread or rice (cooked with some oil), meat, or fish, salatah(fresh salad) and I really like the desert part..fruit salad and sometimes custard...yum,yum..feeling a little bit hungry already. In the picture, we were waiting for food. Eating time is always exciting to me..kuat makan. They will always say...ukli,ukli...ukli kuweiss, anti ma akalti katheer, leh?? and after that they will say: urgudi kuweeisss..hehe (slang).

Bonjour! Lets play petanque!

2005-05-30T07:05:00.000-07:00

We had a friendly petanque(lawn ball) game. My Father was so busy arranging his team, he was so good at making friends among delegates. I had to play too..Well, the first strike was so powerful, that I heard a Quebecer saying:"Oooh, this girl, is she a professional?" The first round was a lucky one, and so they pushed me to play for the second round. You can guess what happened next, none of my strikes were good enough..yikes..told ya, I'm not good at it..har, har, har.. ( it was only at the end of the game when I got to know that I played with professional players!)

By the way, petanque is pronounced as "pay-tonk", one of Europe's most popular outdoor games.

There was a lady asking me one bonus question: " Young lady, mind if I ask you, do you really have hairs under your scarf?" Errk..

My sister agreed that we regretted for not studying a bit of French before going to Quebec. Quebec is mainly a French-speaking society! You'll have to read the history to know the reasons..they call it 'La Francophonie', they are descendents of French and are still mantaining a French speaking society in North America when most of the rest of Canada are using English.The Quebecers were so friendly though. At times, we had to use sign symbols!

We found a number of Muslims, most of them are from Africa. And they did not understand us except if we converse in French which we obviously do not know..and we end up speaking Arabic! Arabic helped us a lot to find Halal restaurants, halal meat, mosques in journeys like this. At least we led the group to halal restaurants. Orang Islam mesti kena belajar cakap Arab...Its our language.

Maid of the midst - Niagara Falls, Canada

2005-05-28T18:29:00.000-07:00

This is one the wonders of the world. The fall is very huge..you'll get splashed even from afar. Somebody showed me that I can actually see the States..the Niagara was at the border of US-Canada. Correct me if I'm wrong. We wore the blue water coat for not getting wet. We really felt like baby genius under experiment walking into the boat, under the waterfall..
Kena belajar geoqrafi lebih sikit, baru boleh appreciate kejadian alam yang dicipta oleh Allah. Subhanallah...Prof Ali Hassan a UM professor was with us. He is an expert in Geog, batu batan..etc...seronok dpt dgr dia share knowledge pasal Niagara Falls.

pretty,pretty wow...

2005-05-28T18:14:00.000-07:00

Come. Lets share some photos from my private archive.

We were watching an elephant show at the Quebec Zoo when we saw a bunch of Canadian kindergarten kids led by their teachers. You should watch them walking in rows tied with safety belts to each other. This is no where around in Malaysia, well, so far.We were so attracted to take pictures with them. They were sooo cute.... Deq An and I took turns to snap some photos. We really look Asian in the middle...ihiks.

mu'askar

2005-05-28T11:02:00.000-07:00

http://photos14.flickr.com/16098932_0b14c776a8_m.jpg

Happy birthday to Amiir!

2005-05-22T18:28:00.000-07:00

20 / 05 /05. It was very exciting to watch Amiir's reaction when we bought him a big walker cum ride-on colourfully wrapped. He sat on the box and clapped! He was so cheerful, maybe he realized that something was special that day and everyone simply made him a superstar! Amiir, you'll be a great person someday..you are already great now!

when decisions have to be made...

2005-05-19T18:02:00.000-07:00

There will be a time where you find it very hard to make a decision. Especially when you have something you want and at the same time having something to lose. Leaving the college is not easy.It has been synonimous to myself for so long...my spirit for the college has always been so strong, the passion of teaching the students, the love of the friendly atmosphere...how can I simply ignore the joy I had. Indeed, at times, the tough work- with no mercy - multi-tasking- tortured us, it has now become the sweet moments I 'll treasure. The college has really brought me up.
Yesterday, we had a farewell lunch for counsellors at TTWgsa. I promised myself not to cry..I thought I was strong, but I was wrong. I ended up crying infront of the people. The cry of sorrow I have kept eversince I got the reply from KUIM. Happy yet painful to leave the love ones. But, life has to go on. I have a future to work hard for. This has always been my dream. And its coming true..
The counsellors, eventhough we only have been together in less than one year, but our bond is so, so strong. The new people I meet particularly in CCGD is Kak Atie...true, somebody worth to know. She's a person you guys can really rely on. Kak Wan, a very loving sister... - hadiah tu mesti Kak Wan yg pilih, tul tak?..Citarasa memang 'class'. best, best.

When I looked at everybody's eyes during my speech, I realize how all of you cared about me. Thank you..including our beloved ustaz Fadhlan. Personally, I adore you as a brother and leader. Tokwe, thanks for being a good friend, I hope I can be a better friend to you. Take gud care of Shu, she really needs you at times like this. As for the rest of the counsellors...as I said, words are too scarce to express everything in my heart..adik-adik - kiah, zana, din,izwan,akma, asma...jaga diri baik-baik...kita dah macam adik beradik. maafkan apa yg tersilap, tersalah...semoga kita sama-sama berjaya di dunia dan di akhirat. InsyaAllah.

zulfa has grown so fast...

2005-05-16T01:59:00.000-07:00

ummuzulfa feels pain on her arm coz of carrying zulfa all day long the day before.